4/5/2005 - Heathers

I may be the only one who thinks this, but I have come to face the harsh reality that all the Heathers in the world are evil. Heathers are like milk, they can only stay good for so long, then they get chunky. JUST KIDDING. I am fully willing to accept that there are maybe... I don't know... seven... nice Heathers on the earth, but I won't be able to confirm this until I meet one. I have had two Heathers as best friends in my life. The first one was in middle school. I remember it well~ We were 14-years-old and totally oblivious to the cruelness of growing up.We were two totally opposite people- I had black hair, she had white-blonde hair, I was thin, she was scrawny. We spent that school year sitting next to eachother in art class every morning joking and laughing. Life was sweet... until -- DUN DUN DUN!!! Highschool attacked! Yes, attacked. It hit us like an automatic door to the face at the local WalMart after closing time. Dear Heather and I grew apart. I became what most called Girly, and she became what she liked to call 'Punk' (everyone else called it nasty). She grew fond of purposly messing up her newly (and badly) died brown hair with palmade, wearing socks with the end cut off on her wrists (with a thumb hole cut on the sides), various types of fishnet stalkings underneath purposely toarn jeans, and combat boots. She came up to me one day sophomore year and told me that she didn't want to hang out with me anymore because her new friends thought I was 'too preppy.' Because of the utter heartbreak (or lack-there-of), I quickly found myself a new best friend to better fill her shoes. Her name was............................. Heather. She too was a blonde ( I should have taken that as a sign to RUN!), tall, and again, very different from myself. Even so, we still had a lot of things in common otherwise. We both had a nack for sarcastic humor, had our own ideas about things, enjoyed doing impressions of various people in our weight training class, and we had some mutual friends. About a month of being friends, we became very best friends. Soon I found myself hating the people she hated, talking about the people she talked about, shutting out the people she shut out-I became pretty much brain washed. Heather and I spent the ENTIRE summer together. We had so much fun, I'll admit that even after all the bad that happened after the summer, I would never give summer up. We hung out at baseball games, hung out with my boyfriend (now ex), hung out with my boyfriend AT baseball games, and I even tried to hook her up with my now boyfriend. We spent the night at eachother's houses, went to the mall, the waterslide park, and we even went camping together. It was the summer of my life. I've never had a better one. But then highschool attacked yet again. She started hanging out with this other girl we knew at the beginning of our junior year. We will call her Hayleigh. Hayleigh was much like my old friend Heather. She was borderline punk, and very nice at first. I soon began to notice a change in Heather, she began talking about how 'hot' shes was, and how sorry she felt for Hayleigh saying (and I quote) "I feel bad for Hayleigh, she's just not as pretty as us." And she would also say things like "Gosh, I just can not have an off day! I look this good all the time!" I then decided that there was something wrong with this girl. Soon they began to shut ME out. I would come up to them sometimes and I would notice a certain silence between them that suggested that I was the recent topic of discussion. It made me sick because I knew I would do anything for this girl. She was my best friend, but she hated me. Eventually, the shutting out, awkward silence, and occasional abandonment, I snapped. I told that Barbie wannabe what for. I told her exactly everything that I thought of HER. A week or so went by when a friend of mine told me that there was writing on the wall about me in Heather's handwriting saying that I was a 'skanky hoe.' It actually made me laugh, but any chance to get back at them without getting in trouble I took it. I filed harrassment on her (them actually- they act together for lack of their own free will). After the first harrassment report, Heather was stupid enough to come up to me and call me a stalker. She said that I followed Hayleigh around the mall (as if I had nothing better to do than follow the bane of the earth ANYWHERE). When I told her that I was at the mall to show my boyfriend a prom dress and that I didn't see ANYONE I knew at the mall, let alone Hayleigh, she said "Whatever! Your a stalker you faggot." Yes, faggot was and is her favorite word. I don't know why but it is. Anyhow, I took the opportunity and filed harrassment again. One more and they'd be ousted from all school activities for a week. I soon got over their feeble attempts to break my spirit. It never worked so I stopped noticing. ***To this day they still do stupid little things, but I choose to feel sorry for them because after highschool, I will never have to look at them again, but they'll always be stuck with themselves. They only have eachother, I've never noticed them with any other friends but eachother. Oh well, I decided. Good for them, I hope they're happy. I hope with this information, you will think twice before trusting a Heather. And if you ARE a Heather (or any teenage girl), I hope you will seriously look at how you treat other people. If you look and you see nothing but good, then keep it up. If not, DON'T BE A HEATHER! It's not too late!

*The name Heather in this blog is the name of actual "Heathers" who I have had as friends in my life. The name was also used as a metaphor represent all the teenage girls guilty of acting like my Heathers. It is not necessarily true that literally all people named Heather are evil. I hope nobody was offended.