3/8/2005 - How Hard Can It Be?
Posted in Unspecified
Exactly. This question is notorious for getting many a babysitter in some deep shit. You may think that taking care of a few elementary school age kids and a baby would be a piece of cake. Right? I mean, the kids can do their own thing.. you know-play video games, draw pictures, watch tv... and you can take care of the baby. Cake! NOT!!! Try this scenario: Three kids-9, 8, and 4, and a baby. You turn on the tv and go upstairs to take care of O-Tiny-One. The next thing you know: BANG!!! SLIDE-THUMP! *silence* .... then....WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!! What the F$%@? You put baby in a carseat on the floor and run downstairs to find out what the hell just happened. You come to find the 4-year-old on the floor against the wall WAILING as the 8- and 9-year-old stand a few feet away wide-eyed and drop-jawed looking on in shock. What were they doing?? You figure things out when you see the couch cushions lining the floor at the end of a makeshift sea-saw catipult made from a matress lying on top of an overturned rocking-chair. "WHAT HAPPENED?!" is all you can manage. The reply is almost in-audible, but you catch something along the lines of "we decided to trick our 4-year-old sister into letting us LAUNCH her against the wall..." Just when you are preparing for sentencing, you hear baby crying.You carry the bleeding child up to the kitchen and give her a cold cloth to put in her mouth just in time for the door bell to ring. You check on the baby before going to the door to find Mom and Dad on the porch because they left their tickets. Peachy! You go through the whole "WHAT HAPPENED?!!" game once again when mom finds Lil' Lucky Lindy(1) on the kitchen floor with a once-white kitchen cloth. You try to explain what happened but you are cut off by "WHAT DID YOU DO???!!!! " You look to see who Mom is talking to and you see Little Orville and Wilbur Wright(2) standing at the top of the stairs looking like shamed puppies with invisible tails between their legs. You sigh with relief thinking Oh, good! She was expecting something like this. She knows her kids are evil!
If any of you have babysat more thatn once will probably have an idea of what I'm talking about. I learned this lesson the hard way: before agreeing to babysit multiple children, first closely examine each child's scalp for little horns.
(1): Lucky Lindy-Charles Lindenburgh flew first solo flight 33 1/2 hours across the across the Atlantic from New York to Paris.
http://www.mtpulaskiil.com/mtpulaskiilWEBsite/Main_Page/Local News/Lindberg/SJ-R_COM - Meeting Lucky Lindy.htm
(2): Orville and Wilbur Wright-brothers who flew the first manned plane. They built a propeller driven airplane that stayed in the air for 12 seconds. http://www.gardenofpraise.com/ibdwrigh.htm
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