Men are wonderful.

I know everyone heard me complaining on D but today I was so impressed with him that now I have to recant it. I am sorry D, you are still a great guy. You do still amaze especially when it comes to cars and hard work.

Let me start off telling you a little about D. He isn't the brightest bulb in the box, but he knows a little about what he is doing. He gets on my nerves and under my skin worse than any other person ever will, but that is also what makes me love him. He doesn't argue with me, but will sit there and let me rant and rave to my heart's content (which always makes me feel like a complete jackass). He can and does work his ass off at a saw mill, lifting between 50 and 100 pounds all day long. He is crazy for hanging out with me, that is for sure. I have known him for the last three years but it feels like forever. He is only twenty, and is excited to turn 21 even though he doesn't drink. His favorite colors are orange and yellow (which I think are the worse colors ever invented).

Why all the background? Well he did some of the most amazing things. One of which he did today....but let me start with soem of the past things he has done.

I meet him a few weeks after me and my husband split. he was my sister's husband's best friend and I was staying with my sis to help with the kids since her new baby was just born. He use to ride all night long with me, trying to get J to sleep and let me cry myself stupid about the stuff with Ex. He would just let me talk for hours and at the time I thought it was sweet. Later I just realized he doesn't talk, almost like he has no feelings. Around that time, I started drinking heavy and he was the one that opened my eyes to the things I was doing to myself and my kids. He has a very bad temper when he gets mad and I saw him beat a man so bad that the guy was in the hospital. The reason behind it was because this man hurt his niece, so it is kind of understandable. He loves his mom more than I think is healthy. he loves cars, and works on them constantly though he is more winging it than knowing the facts. He can love like the best man in the world, but he hates just a strong too.

Well today I watched him fix the axle on his car. Now for some this isn't an amazing feat, but it really is for him. He worked 11 hours today and then went with just a hammer and a screwdriver and fixed it all alone. That, to me, is absolutely amazing. He is the hardest working man I have ever meet when he works, but at home he is lazy. So for him to be that determined on something like that and without the tools to actually fix it was so cool to me. I was just watching him do it and it was like he just wanted to show me that he could do it.
I think he loves me....which is scary. I mean the whole episode looked like he was trying to show me how impressive he is. I am impressed with him all the time, but I don't think of him like that. I think of him as one of the kids most of the time. Not on purpose, but he has more fun at the park than the kids do. I just always see him like another person I have to take care of.

How do you go from that to anything else? Can you make a relationship out of something like this? I don't think so. I think it is more that we are always going to be friends forever, but then why do I never like the girls he is with? I am never a jealous person, so I don't think it is that. It is more like I cannot think of anyone who I feel is good enough for him.

Hmmmmm......I wonder

11:40 PM - 3/31/2005 - post comment