Scared and running

I am the first person to say when I get scared, I will run away. If that means running to a new town or a new state or just running to hide by myself for a few days, I can do it and usually will do it. When I meet D, he told me stop running because you will always find yourself where ever you go, and that is true.So for the last two and a half years I have stayed put and gave up on the running. But in hte last few days, I feel it slowly creeping and I want to run. I want to take the kids and hide from all of the hurt and stress going on and maybe it won't follow us. Maybe cancer lives In WB but if I run to the 'Ville and hide in the thousands of people there it won't find us, but will find someone else more deserving. AAhhhh if the world and disease worked that way.

But really, who is deserving of a disease? The murderers and child rapists, maybe. Even then I would say that is a cruel and unusual punishment. But I mean, I have heard every excuse from this is God trying to show me something to this is just what happens to certain people. Really I don't care what the reason. I just want to know the kids are ok and that they are happy in their lives and that they always know I love them.

10:14 AM - 4/22/2005 - post comment

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graceandpeace - 1:14 PM - 4/22/2005

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