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KEEPING MY SANITY Home | Profile | Archives | Friends
I believe that many people have reasons why they write in diaries/journals/blogs.:P Hey, I can even list some of those here pretty easy: 1."I just love writing. It's my hobby." 2.I think too much. If I don't do something really constructive and productive about it, I am afraid that my poor head will soon explode!*big evil grin* 3."I write better than I talk, and I don't feel like wasting other people's precious time listening (and waiting impatiently) to my stutterings. That's awfully embarrassing!" 4."Not everybody in the world can always accept brutal honesty. That's what I am truly aware of." 5."I feel that the world is slowly lacking sympathy.:( Still, you know what to do when nobody bothers to at least spend a little time to listen to your problems." 6."I can be my own heroine in my own storybook!";D 7.... ...and the list could go on forever. However, I'd like to sum it all up with my own reason these days: "This is my way of keeping my sanity." ......................... *big evil grin* Yes, people. That's right. I am seriously addicted to writing. This has been my therapy. You may and may not like what I write in here. That is truly up to you. Besides, I am just here to present my point of view. So, welcome to my world. The Author

BACK TO WORK...:P10/22/2007

Finally, I'm back to work.:P Yes, the restaurant's opened today. It's a late start, I know, but still better than never. Everything else in my hometown's also gone back to normal. The traffic's crowded, as usual.:| What else?
 I'm still where I am today. No, I'm not saying this with such bitterness. I still want to remain grateful with my blessings.;) But that doesn't mean that I'll just stop working for a much better life and let myself get stagnated...like some people.*rolls eyes* Hell, no! I'm still sending job applications elsewhere. I'm still sending my writings for extra cash. I may not always succeed, but that doesn't mean I'm quitting.:x I don't want to be as good as dead.
 *deep sigh*
 There.:P I've just said it all. Don't you dare expect me to bawl my eyes out just because of countless rejections like I've already received before. You'll seriously have to kill me for that. Grrrh!:x
 Speaking of job searches, we've got more and more newcomers in Jakarta from all around the smaller towns, villages, and even...*gasps* islands.:O Yeah, that's always the case every year after Eid vacations --- mass migration. Just like people who are trying to get their big breaks in New York or even...Hollywood.*big evil grin* Usually, the survivors who have already bet all their lives in Jakarta will go back home and tell their fellows and relatives about its magnificent beauty. I can't really blame them, though. After all, this is the capital city.:| It's the symbol of 'modern' life, success, and prosperity. (Yeah, right --- to some people. Ha-ha.*big evil grin*) You can get quick, easy money from there. You'll have lots of choices available in front of you (without really mentioning the price to pay). You can be more modern and richer...
 *yawns hugely* If they only knew...
 Okay, pardon my sarcasm.:P But some dreams can still be rudely crushed by reality. Some may succeed, but some also can fail and go back home with nothing but complete misery. Heck, some can even disappear forever in big city like forgotten ghosts. Get some, lose some. There's no such thing as 'quick and easy' money, unless if it's from 'illegal' work.*rolls eyes* Are they kidding or what? I've already heard too much sad stories about people naively pursuing their fantasies. This is not a fairy-tale. But somehow, hedonism in the city has tricked these gullible souls into dangerous fast-lanes. Hmm, let's see. A low-life waitress who agrees to be one of the concubines or even the second/third/fourth wife, just because some lecherous, wealthy creep offers her more money and promises her a 'better' life. A local street thug who's also a secretly hired assassin. What else?:( Trust me, people. It's been going on and on for decades here. I think it's getting worse.
 And --- tragically --- trafficking and forced prostitutions are also using the same, lame line:
 "Miss, I have a great job for you. Trust me, it'll pay you very, very well. Just come with me to the big city, okay?"
 .........................
 I think that's why I'm grateful that --- somehow --- my fate is much better than theirs.:|
 Well, how am I doing today?:P My lower right wisdom tooth is killing me.:( I know I was supposed to go to the dentist today, but still haven't had the chance yet. I'm working today, but will go tomorrow...
 And I don't feel like eating anything that much lately. It just kills my appetite.:| But hey, look on the bright side.:P Since last holiday, I've somehow let myself slide and gained more weight...again.:| 143 lbs.*gulps* AAARRGH!!!:O
 It's time for weight control again.:( I'm not going to let myself be fat and miserable again. No fucking way!:x Been there, done that. Enough is enough.
 If I've succeeded before, then I can definitely do it again.:D And I will. I must. I still know how to.;)
 Alright, enough worrying about my weight.:P

 The Author

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