My redneck is driving me crazy!!!!!Half the time she loves me and the other half I feel like shes falling away from me! And it really fucking sucks! Im am trying to get back to her and be with her cause thats what I want and thats what will make me happy! And once I'm there I know I could make her happy! But I just feel like she dosent really belive it!Ya know what I mean?! And I love her so much! And speaking of loving her she just sent me a text message that said "I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!" .  Last night she told me that if I dont go to her ship she is gonna quit! Cool I understand, but if she quits then I told her that I would quit too and we could just come back to Texas, and then we could be together! But she didnt really sound like she we into that idea very much. I also told her that if not Texas than wherever she wanted to go I would go too! But she still didnt sound real happy about any of it. Also when we were talking somehow gay marriage came up and we were talking about one of her friends went to canada and did it, and also in spain its legal. And just fucking aroundI told her if we ever did I wanted to go to Spain cause Canada sucks! And she she shot me this really negative energy and said "who ever said we would get married!?!" And I just felt like I should apologise to her or something! Like I felt bad about saying it! It was really weird! I really love her alot and I dont want to like make this out to be bigger worse than it is, but I dont want her to give up on us! She is all I think about all day every day! And sometimes I feel like my heart is breaking and then other times I feel like it will explod in my chest cause I love her so much it hurts! But in a good way! I just wish she knew how much I love her and care about her! I would do anything for her! I just dont know what to do! Any advice? Anyone? Im trying to get back ASAP! Well thats all for now.

 ~Blessed Be~                        MisCatt