Observation: Dwelling on the other’s faults not only separates close friends, it also destroys the intimacy and threatens the very existence of marriage. Everyone has faults. As much as we may see them in others, others can see them in us. What is called for is grace. God extended grace to us, not counting our faults against us, and enables us to extend grace to ourselves and to others as well.
We simply can not live in close relationships without being willing to extend grace. In marriage counseling, you discover very quickly that a lack of willingness to extend grace and forgiveness is usually at the very heart of the problems the couple is experiencing.
We may have grown up in an environment where we had every little mistake was pointed out, made fun of and punished. We may, by force of habit, find ourselves reacting the same way as adults towards other we love.
Perhaps it is time to come to God and to ask Him to heal this wound from our childhood and break the lack-of-grace habit. We need to realize, as our new Father, that He would never treat us that way and, in really feeling that truth, we are freed up not to have to react to others with that kind of judgment either.