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Labyrinth of the Mind

Quote of the Week

The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knoweldge of its ugly side ~ Jame Baldwin

 

Runners Up:

 

Man exploits man. Under communisim, it's just the opposite ~ Russian Proverb

 

Books bear him up a while, and make him try to swim with bladders of philosophy ~ John Wilmot

 

If poverty is the mother of crime, stupidity is its father ~ Jean de La Bruyere

 

When a thing ceases to be a subject of controversy, it ceases to be a subject of interest ~ William Hazlitt

 

Genius...means little more than the faculty of preciving in an unhabitual way ~ William James

 

 

9:42 AM - 7/4/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

On the Road

Posted in Books

I have recently just started reading On the Road by Jack Kerouac, and it is all about the Beat generation, and it is quite different from anything I have read before. With the exception of some Beat Poetry, of much of which I admitidly do not care for all that much, I haven't really read anything coming from the Beat generation, and Kerouac is thought as being one of the "kings" of the Beat's and in fact cridited with coming up with the term, Beat. The book is in a tone and style that is quite unlike the things I have read before, as it does have a very "hippy" feeling to it, because the Beats were very akin to the hippies, in thier attitudies, in a way they are like hippies of the liteary world. As most the Beats were writers, poets, and other artists.

 

While I am too soon into the book, to really know what I think of it, right now I do have certain ambigious feelings about it, so far it is not really drawing me in, but it is quite a new experince, but I did think this passage was really quite marvelous. Something about it just really struck me.

 

I woke up as the sun was reddening; and that was the one distinct time in my life, the strangest moment of all, when I didn't know who I was--I was far away from home, haunted and tired with travel, in a cheap hotel room I'd never seen, hearing the hiss of steam outside, and the creak of the old wood of the hotel, and footsteps upstairs, and all the sad sounds, and I looked at the cracked high ceiling and really didn't know who I was for about fifteen strange seconds. I wasn't scared; I was just somebody else, some strange, and my whole life was a haunted life, the life of a ghost. I was halfway across America, at the dividing line between the East of my youth and the West of my future, and maybe that's why it happened right there and then, that strange red afternoon.


 

11:08 AM - 7/2/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Spider, Spider on the Wall

Posted in Poetry
Spider, Spider on the Wall
 
Spider, spider on the wall
caught within your fractured light
who is the fairest of them all?
 
Wrapped in silk before I fall
never evading from your sight
spider, spider on the wall.
 
Awaiting you to answer my call
through the darkest hours of night
who is the fairest of them all?
 
Echo's down your distant hall
where pale faces look in fright
spider, spider on the wall.
 
Wrap me in your woven shall
so in these nightmares I take delight
who is the fairest of them all?
 
You are my only crystal ball
capturing something of your insight
spider, spider on the wall
who is the fairest of them all?

1:47 PM - 7/1/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Revisiting the Past

Posted in Thoughts
I love Tex Avery, for me he is like a cartoon genius, as a kid, he was the next best thing to Looney Toons, I loved watching marathons of the Tex Avery Show.

For those who are not familiar with Tex Avery, well it is like Looney Toons, but often times with a bit more of an edge, and at times quite risque.

He has this whole modern "adult" version of Little Red Riding Hood, in which Little Red Riding Hood, is a babe who works in a Gentleman's Club and the Big Bad Wolf, is basically a sleazy pervert. And Red Riding Hood's grandma, is this randy old woman going after the wolf, while he is chasing Riding Hood.

He also does the Bugs Bunny and Road Runner type thing as well, with animal characters chasing each other around trying to do merciless violence to each other.

And he does a lot of just really wacky stuff. But it all has this sort of edge to it.

So I recently discovered Youtube as a lot of the old Tex Avery stuff on it, which I was quite exciting so I was spending my time, watching old cartoons on my computer.

But the thing that strikes me as amusing, is that his work originally came out around the late 40's and when I was watching it was probably 90's but today his stuff would probably censored from TV.

It might make it on Adult Swim but it certainly could never pass in this day and age as being marketed to children and at the time that I was watching it as a kid, it was considered perfectly acceptable.

Certain people like to complain a lot about modern times and its loose morals and how sex is everywhere on TV and yet there are times when for something that I would consider to be really quite harmless, I am left thinking, wow, there was a time when that would actually be allowed to be aired on TV and watched by children. No way would that fly now, because some little group might be offended by it.

10:27 AM - 7/1/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

100 Greatest Books ~ Update

Posted in Books

I came acros this list of what are considered to be the 100 greatest books of the 20th century, I decided that I would reach each of these books, here is the list of books I have read. The numbders in front of the title is the order they appear on the list. The * are a sort of 5 star rating system for how well I liked the book. I will also list if any the books I am in the progress of reading.

TBA = To Be Announced

 

2.The Great Gastby * * * *

 

10. The Grapes of Wrath * * *

 

41. Lord of the Flies * * * *

 

45. The Sun Alos Rises * * * *

 

48. The Rainbow * * * *

 

64. The Catcher in the Rye * * * * *

 

78. Kim * * *

 

88.The Call of the Wild * * * * *

 

93. The Maugs * * * * *

 

21. Henderson the Rain King * * * *

 

69. The House of Mirth* * * * *

 

13. 1984 * * *

 

20. Native Son * * *

 

9. Sons and Lovers * * * *

 

31. Animal Farm * * *

 

3. A Portrait of the Artist As A Yong Man * *

 

58. The Age of Innocence * * *

 

15. To The Lighthouse * * *

 

25. A Passage To India * * * *

 

65. A Clockwork Orange * * * *

 

34. A Handful of Dust * * * *

 

84. The Death of the Heart * * * *

 

7. Catch-22 * * * *

 

27. The Ambassadors * * * *

 

24. Winseburg, Ohio * * * *

 

14. I, Claudius * * *

 

79. A Room With A View * * *

 

54. Light in August * * *

 

73. The Day of the Locust * * *

 

36. All the King's Men * *

 

5. Brave New World * * *

 

49. Women in Love * * * *

 

Books in Progress:

 

On the Road

 

 

9:33 AM - 6/30/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Reading List ~ Update

Posted in Books

Here is a list of books I am currently reading. I will keep it updated as I finnish books and start new books.

 

Cats Eye

 

Gatherer of Clouds

 

The Devil In Music

 

The Tommyknockers

 

The Stone of Tears

 

People of the Earth

 

Caravan To Xanadu

 

The Fire of Heaven

 

Twenty Years After
 

The Quincunx

 

The Agony and the Ecstasy

 

On The Road

 

9:31 AM - 6/30/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Quote of the Week

One of my favorite Gandhi quotes becasue it sums up what I always say and what I beleive

 

I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christinas are so unlike your Christ ~ Gandhi

9:04 AM - 6/26/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

To J.D. With Love

Posted in Books
I have rediscovered an old lover, and my whole body ached with anticipation while my mind flew back to our stolen movements of the past, how I yearned once more to get my hands upon you, now that we were faced with each other again. Never before have you failed me, you were always there, in your cold, distant, aloofness which shudders through my soul and speaks of unspeakable, undefinable depths. Whatever others may say. I know there are those that fail to understand, that look at your through harsh judging eyes, and do not realize the beauty, cannot touch it or imagine it, fail to be moved into your world, but you are mine, and have always been, we share in something, we understand each other.

Yes! I recall when we first met, in the days of my early youth, when then you were a strange, a great unknown force. It was of course The Catcher in the Rye are first unforgettable encounter. Holden captured me, he emersed himself within my blood, I was fascinated with him. I was Holden, he was me, we were united by a sacred bond. I eagerly devoured him as I trembled through the pages to unveil all those hidden depths. We were both two lost souls, who were not meant for this world, how I needed him then, and you, you gave him to me. It still lingerers, how I could never forget those first defining moments that would fate us together.
 
But alas for a time we had come to part from each other, you slipped through my fingertips, when by luck, by hope, by destiny I found you again, and I craved more of you, I took all which I could lay my hands upon, and you gave to me Seymour. Oh Seymour, how he moves within me, captivating, unescapable, that beautiful cold bitterness, that lustful cynicism. I readily, eagerly, took Seymour in. He would haunt me more then once through the pages and how I longed for it, how it touched the depths of me. He is my tragic hero, and we both need him, he linked us together again, in an unbreakable union.

There are countless other shades which you have brought to life, to slip through my blood stream, to fill my anticipation, to move me beyond myself. I drink them all in, I become drunk upon them, they touch me, reach inside of me, in many ways, they are me. Yes! It is true, I feel as if I could be one of your creations. Every more, I become as they are, and identify with them. Never once have I smoked in my life, nor ever had the least desire to do so, and never intend to start now, but in the depths of the back of my mind, there I sit, a throw back from the 40's smoking french cigarettes, with a terse smile, and brittle laugh, bursting with cruel insincerity while watching the world through beautiful jaded eyes.

You will never be forgotten, even once I have had all from you there is to have, you will still live within me, pulse throughout me, have a lingering place within my subconscious mind, move me, and tingle through my blood. Because we understand each other you and I.

3:00 PM - 6/25/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Her Dark Rein

Posted in Poetry
Her Dark Rein
 
Deep
beneath
her still heart
darkness awakes
from her crypt she rises into the night
terror shrieks through the darkening sky
blood falls like rain
where she walks
until
dawn

1:26 PM - 6/25/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Requiem of the Bard

Posted in Poetry
Requiem of the Bard

Beneath the winter trees I heard him play
songs of woe and watery dead soles
now there remains but old dead bones
'neath the shade of the gravestone
a name erased by time
a voice still lingers
sweet as wild thyme
nare to fade
with the
age

12:13 PM - 6/25/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

You Forsake Me

Posted in Poetry
You Frosake Me
 
I've been down
this road before
feeling it all start
to slip.
 
In your eyes
I see reflections
of the past.
 
All your words
left forgotten,
you will start to
become another one
of them.
 
Promises fall empty
when your actions
fall short and
I am left in the dust.
 
You would close
the door in my face
and lay to waste
all that came before.

10:11 PM - 6/22/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Shades of Me

Posted in Poetry
Shades of Me

I wear my thorns on the inside
to keep my scars hidden from sight

I seek no sympathy
and restrain my tears

Encased within my outer shell
feeling the rose begin to wilt a fraction of an inch

But I refuse to be consumed by remorse
feeling my soul shudder inside

While the rain might fall inside my heart
I close my eyes and remember how to breathe

Never will I betray the inner depths of me
always working to rebuild cracks before they show

No one shell ever see
the changing shades of me

4:08 PM - 6/22/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Tarnished Pearl

Posted in Poetry
Tarnished Pearl
 
I'll shut myself
in my box again
steel myself
I have been here before
a thousand times
I'll never break
nor crack
 
I should have known
it would come to this
so I return back
to the cold
 
They never stay
they always go
but it is the fate
of my soul
 
So I can shut the door
and redefine my cage
these bars are my friends
hard to the touch
none can penetrate
 
I've laughed at myself
in those hidden depths
of truth
so perhaps I've asked
for this
 
But I plead no excuse
I can stand for myself
while I watch the shadows
pass
 
Memories fade
and I can begin to erase
I am like ore
hard and rough
while I hide myself
behind this shell
and the words
of a distant past
echo in my mind...

10:09 PM - 6/20/2009 - comments {1} - post comment

Insatiable Desire

Posted in Poetry
Insatiable Desire
 
I have had countless
love affairs
always tantalized
my body quivers
in anticipation
to grasp my hands
upon a new lover
 
It's the thrill for
the unknown
ever seeking that touch
of something new
so I explore these
avenues
 
My taste runs countless
and never could I
give it up
the craving inside of me
they each begin as strangers
and slowly unfold
before me as we
begin to know each other
 
There are moments
of pure ecstasy
while others do at times
falter
 
Some sink into the blood
and last for days
after we parted
our way
 
Leaving behind lingering
desire that there was more
to devour
while others slip away
from memory
best left forgotten
 
How my fingers tremble
when I move to turn
the next page
for nothing satisfies
quite as a new book.

3:23 PM - 6/19/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Quote of the Week

What I like in a good author is not what he says, but what he whispers ~ Logan Pearsall Smith

 

Runners Up:

 

All my best thoughts were stolen by the ancients ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

No matter how well you preform there's always somebody of intelligent opinion who thnkns it's lousy ~ Laurence Olivier

8:41 AM - 6/19/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

What Was Lost

Posted in Raw
I am deflated
mistaken
craving self-infliction
like an infection
lost in my own darkness
I carry myself away
never can I forget
you face
 
Haunting me from the past
all the ghosts speak
to my and I pray
my own dark prayers
how the night hangs heavy
and I crave to regain
something lost
 
But how many have
disappeared
leaving me to question
the sky
 
My soul cannot truly speak
with all that I seek
for the opal inside
another look into your eyes
 
Sea green
waters that carried
some part of my soul away
but now here I remain
still part in shade
never to be entirely
free
 
For you hold
still some part of me
and secretly I yearn
to come before you
once more

12:25 AM - 6/19/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

The Mirror Which Flatters Not

Posted in Poetry
The Mirror Which Flatters Not *
 
It is true I am fraud
my moth lips flutter
over dark night lies
my eyes rapt in the headlights
 
All the secrets I try to hide
in a sunless box
kept upon the mantel
to catch in the moonlight
 
Falling inside of myself
where the fireflies live
within my heart
offering only fleeting
illumination
 
How I try to shed the mask
showing more often tragedy
while I grimace inside
my tears are opals
 
A cloudy haze hardened
in stone, just as the
core of my soul
cleaved in two as I try
to uncover a fragment
of sincerity.
 
*Title credit to my friend who came up with the name

10:52 PM - 6/18/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

Christians Against Christ

Posted in Thoughts
As we all know one of the biggest problems, if not THE problem I have with Christianity is the way in which they constantly want to impose their own personal view points on everyone else. I do not want someone else's morality in my living room, and I do not need some other religion dictating me how to live my life. So in pondering over this because a recent debate had put the idea fresh into my mind again, a thought occurred to me. 
 
God granted man the gift of free will, a fact that Christians themselves are so found of bringing up whenever faced with a question regarding their religion which they cannot explain, (among other classic favorites like God works in mysterious ways) and so basically Christians are in fact trying to stifle the divine gift that their God gave to mankind in their constant attempts to want to take rights, freedom's and choices away from other people who do not live according to their ideals. 
 
So in the Christians attempts to ban gay marriage, illegalize abortion, fight against the teaching of evolution, and force the ideas of Creationism, fighting against scientific research (of which I myself do not always approve of), and burning books like Harry Potter, not to mention missionaries to other countries to impose their views, and these are of course only their recent hits, never mind some of their old favorites (need I say inquisition) Christians are basically through their actions stating they in face our superior to God and no better then God what mankind should and should not do, and they wish to deny God's own gift of freedom of choice. Now correct me if I am wrong here, but does that not sound a lot like the big B word that makes them shudder so much? Yes dare I say it, Blasphemy. 

Christians are all bunch of blasphemers. 

I as Heathen who does not believe in the Christian concept of God, am in fact a better Christian then most Christians are. Because I cherish the gift of free will, granted I might make choices that are less appealing to God, but at least I do not try to impose my own personal will against others and I respect ones ability to make choices for their own life. Christians on the other hand pretty much give Gods free will a big fact middle finger.

And if I recall correctly there was this whole big deal with Christ being Crucified and dying for our sins,  so we could have the gift of free will. So every time a Christian tries to impose their own personal will over another person and attempts to take away someone else's right and freedoms they are spitting in the face of Christ

3:30 PM - 6/18/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

The Vanishing Grail

Posted in Poetry
The Vanishing Grail
 
I live my life
a body of lies
where I have thousands of eyes
all that I withhold
to erect my tower of secrets
 
With my lips sealed in wax
I build upon the drama
like whispers of a black mass
 
Keeping the gate locked tight
you may only peer inside my world
in this I hold the power
as a rumor of the philosophers stone
all hidden knowledge is but mine alone
 
I dangle the key
a tempting device
but the hand is quicker
then the eye and
with a mystic air
it disappears
leaving you again in the dark
 
Offering just enough
to tantalize
while beginning to believe in
my own illusions
 
Crafting conspiracy
which leaves me paranoid
while running from my own shadows
still ever dragging you in tow
you taste the danger
and long to touch that something
of the vanishing grail
 
So I discover hidden codes
tangled in my own obsession
connecting the dots becomes
an effortless task
scared geometry everywhere
 
I speak of worlds beyond
conjured from a dream-drugged mind
on dark nights by candlelight
truth and reality loose all meaning
 
I drew you into my web
of self-deceiving ecstasy
so you would thirst for a taste
of the profane sacrecy  
buried in the ruins of my heart.

5:47 PM - 6/17/2009 - comments {1} - post comment

My Lady of the Grave

Posted in Poetry
My Lady of the Grave
 
I feel the touch
of your cold lips
flush against mine
in your frozen kiss
 
Your pure white
virgin-whore flesh
seers through me
burning in your ice
 
Waves of your
hair as dark as the night
with the moon
caught in your eyes
 
Helpless as you
pull me down beneath
the soil to rest
within this grave
 
You have come
all pale flesh
with haunting eyes
sweet as death
to draw me away
into your subterranean
paradise
 
Your Land of the Dead
where I will spend
the rest of my days
never to see the light again
but always with you.

2:14 PM - 6/15/2009 - comments {0} - post comment

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Quote of the Week: The price one pays for pursuing any profession or calling is an intimate knoweldge of its ugly side ~ Jame Baldwin

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