When I started this journal and journey how ever long ago, I was struggling with what should have been the happiest time of my life. I was a much loved wife and a brand new mom. My beloved husband would not be going back to war; my beautiful adopted son had just come home from the hospital after a mere 24 hours. I was surrounded by family and friends, with a roof over my head and an ocean breeze to lull me to sleep at night. And yet I was miserable.
I happened to land on JournalHome and found I had a place there. I could rage and vent and cry in the relative anonymity of cyberspace. Blogging all my trials and tribulations, trite as though they may have seemed, was my saving grace in a dark and desperate time. I mean, who knew you could have post partum depression when you´ve never even given birth? How fortunate was I to have even made some friends along the way...
Now, fast forward. I am in a much different place. The love of my life, St. Hubby remains by firmly by my side; the other love of my life, my beautiful adopted son is a healthy, bright, joyous 21 month old bundle of energy. I am still surrounded by family and friends, with a roof over my head and an ocean breeze that lulls me to sleep at night. But I have exorcised the demons that prevented me from truly embracing all the tender mercies and many blessings in my life. JH is largely responsible for that - free therapy! - and for that I am grateful.
My blogging has dropped off quite a bit lately (although I suppose it is typically egotistic of me to believe anyone has noticed), as my energies have turned elsewhere. I am no longer completely entrenched in my own misery; no longer have the burning need to document my every angst. After all, there are husbands to be kissed and flowers to be named and bugs to be looked at, puppies to pet, toes to be tickled and stories to be read.
Because I am a Mother now, and all that entails. I have the greatest, hardest, most rewarding, exasperating job on earth. Oh, I am still me: I wear my tiara occasionally; I do not function well on four hours of sleep; I curse when I am mad, and I am vain and selfish at times. But I am a much better driver - and a much better me. Becoming a Mom (and a grown up) did that.
Whew. What a journey.
Until we meet again, blessings to you all.
Mary Kate and William
aka Caffeinedmom and Junior
p.s. Love and thanks to Dawnie, CyberMom to everyone...
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