Okay, so let me see if I get this...?

Jimmy Swaggart and Jim Bakker, who openly condemned adultery from the pulpit were both caught having skanky freak sex with women to whom they were not married. Ted Haggard, who made it his mission in life to verbally abuse gays and lesbians from the pulpit (and teach little children how to hate them as well), got busted having skanky sex with a man to whom he was not married - and doing drugs with said man, who was also a prostitute. Tony Leyva, another family values advocate when behind the pulpit, was arrested several years ago for having sex with underage boys. Newt Gingrich made a shameless habit of cheating on his wife (Gingrich is a special breed of scumbag - in 1981 he forced his wife, who had helped put him through graduate school, to haggle over the terms of their impending divorce while she was still in the hospital recovering from uterine cancer surgery). John McCain, serial cheater. Rudy Giuliani, serial cheater. Don't even get me started on the child molesting priests.

Now we have David Vitters, who not only consorted with hookers while masquerading as a decent, upright, christian, married...blah blah blah (matters not, it's a load of bullshit anyway). And by his side, his obviously completely humiliated and in emotional agony, but equally hypocritical Mrs. Vitters. Not one but BOTH of these fuckwits had the unmitigated, shameless nerve to take the Clintons to task publicly after Bill was caught with Monica Lewinsky. David Vitters personally made it his mission to smear Bill at every opportunity and was the most loud-mouthed advocate of impeachment. His wife went after Hillary with equal venom, taking every public opportunity to trash her for her choice to remain married to Bill now that his escapades were common knowledge.

Instead of 'GOP', the Republicans should change their motto to the 'Do As We Say, Not As We Do' party.

The most incredibly, brazenly offensive part of all of this is that these two pieces of conservative shit went after Bill and Hillary with such impassioned vigor, making it their personal missions in life to make sure the issues of infidelity and impeachment - not to mention morality, family values, and all of the other feel-good but completely false supposed 'values' they stand for stayed at the front of the collective minds of American voters. They went after the Clintons like a couple possessed, claws out, teeth bared.

Then we find out that not only is Vitters a serial cheater (with hookers - and that's taking a huge risk with his wife's health as well as his own; nice to be loved, no?), he was guilty of doing the exact same thing he was attacking Bill Clinton for at the exact same fucking time!!!!

Here's the best part; when the two were so aggressively pursuing the Clintons the philosophy used to justify it was that 'the American public deserved to know'.

When Vitters himself is busted, suddenly it becomes a 'private family matter'. This filthy, lying, potentially diseased piece of right-wing garbage has, it seems (with great speed and dexterity) taught himself a brand new tune. Now he sings the praises of marital privacy and refuses to answer the same questions he wanted - nay, DEMANDED - Bill Clinton confront, only Vitters, proving himself to be as cowardly as he is hypocritical, is hiding behind his wife's humiliation while doing so. Like a scared little boy clinging to his mommy's skirts because he saw something startling on the tv box.

Dishonest, over-priviledged, hypocritical pieces of shit, the lot of them. Not a one to be trusted in the bunch.

That won't stop them from publicly condemning any and every move Democrats make, both politically and personally, however.

If one decent thing comes out of this it will be the sudden and painful awakening of conservatives. Something (many, many somethings, apparently) need to be altered or replaced altogether within their party and the sad thing is it will probably never happen. Because god forgives and even if they do a lot of wrong, they're still more correct and moral than the Democrats, right? No matter how many of them get caught snacking from someone else's candy bowl *while still dipping into their own* it's all good because they're the party of morality.

Family values indeed.

I hope they shrivel up and fall off, Vitters.