Anger

Anger is often one of the most obvious traits of borderline personality disorder (BPD), as so often the anger seems explode without warning and can be extremely intense.

The anger of the BP is hard to miss, as it is often an attack, meant to hurt back, and meant to defend. It seems to come from nowhere, a suddenly explosive rage. The BP may not even understand why she feels so angry, just that she feels this way.

Anger In Place Of Other Feelings

For those with BPD, anger often develops from other unexpressed and uncomfortable feelings, such as frustration, sadness, disappointment, and anxiety that the BP is unable to experience or express. The life of the BP, like anyone, is full of frustrations, disappointments, and stresses, but the BP can be unable to process them effectively, inadvertently storing them.

Anger tends to be an emotion that can be easier to recognize and express. The BP may be able to respond, or react, to the anger, but not other emotions.

What Triggers the Anger Outburst?

Anger can be an omnipresent feeling for those with borderline personality disorder. It may be that it is always there, sleeping and not noticed, but easily awakened. Once awakened, the anger makes its presence known, loudly and ferociously, almost like a hibernating bear.

The angry outburst is experienced by the BP as a reasonable reaction to threat, attack, or hurt by the target of the rage. The target, or recipient, of the anger attack may be completely caught off-guard, unaware of what they did to trigger this reaction. The BP’s anger can have a hair trigger; little is required to set it off.

Often the BP feels raw, hyperaware of every potential negative be it a slight, danger, or disappointment. Everything feels much stronger: a slight from a coworker can feel like a stabbing pain, overwhelming in its intensity, blocking out all other thoughts. Anger then seems a natural reaction, something to be expected, perhaps even something understandable.

What the Anger Is

It is important to remember that anger, even the explosive anger often so evident in borderline personality disorder, is nothing more than an expression of feelings. Although the anger can seem out of synch to an observer, for the BP the anger is an honest reaction to hurts and fears. It is real.

For the BP, feelings of anger are very strong and often have a lot of old “baggage” behind them. It is not always clear to the BP, or those witnessing the anger, how the “baggage” is tied to the current target or event that triggered to interaction. However, for the BP, the old feelings, or baggage, were triggered and the current reaction is an honest display of her feelings. A display meant to protect, or defend, and to communicate.

Rage is a very challenging and difficult aspect of Borderline Personality
Disorder, (BPD) for both the person with BPD and those who know someone with
BPD. The degree to which rage effects those with Borderline Personality Disorder
(BPD), like the degree which rage manifests itself, can be a very individual
experience. Rage is encompassed within the Borderline trait:

intense anger or difficulty controlling anger; frequent displays of temper"
(listed in the DSM-IV)
Some people with BPD will manifest this rage inwardly through self-harm,
suicide attempts and others will manifest it outwardly by either showing "fits
of rage, temper, anger" (yelling - push/pull behaviour -- the "I hate you don't
leave me" kind of thing) or through emotional abuse and physical abuse of those
closest to them and or toward therapists. And some borderlines will express this
rage both inwardly and outwardly. In my Expierience I feel Rage all of the Sudden and It usually is brought on by someone not giving me my nway, or challenging Me in one way or another. Foe Example, Today The Landlord of my Aprtment would not fix the Lock on the door, he said it was our responsibility, I felt wronged in this situation but he would not Listen to me ( could be that he did not understand English) So I started cursing and Yelling and feeling this intense Anger inside, sense of Rejection and Hurt, I was At the boiling Point and had to walk away, I imagine that in this instance and others that I feel Wronged , I rage because I feel that I am not in Control and I think that by Bringing it to the next level and combatting with Anger I can get my way and be right. I am not sure of all the Reasons That I get Angry and have this Inappropriate reaction to Authority and others that have Control over me or Stir up this Rage in Me But I know that It may have to do with always feeling like the Victim and that as a child My family never told me "NO" or at least not for very Long. I know that my Anger is also a feeling of coping with the Inner turmoil inside of me, The Guilt over Relapsing, The shame and fear that consumes me and my Helplessness to make positive changes, a way of making others see things my way, a cry for help.. it is very Common that Alcoholics and Addicts as well as those with Severe Mental and Emotional Instability have a strong Inability to Control their Anger or any Emotions at all. It is also common that the Borderline Lashes out at others in order to take some of the Blame off themselves for their shortcomings in Life and To escape the Constant feeling of Being Emotionally Trapped. When I feel angry I feel out of control, Like this adrenaline stirs in me and I react suddenly in these intense and outragous ways , Often resulting in Harm to others but mostly to myself as I then Burn the  Bridge and often more than One. My anger is caused by Pain, Fear, and overall Feeling of Helplessness to solve the problem with a Pòsitive result in my favor. Like I said, I do not know why Myself or others have such Rage But Know that it is not the Correct response, But only one I know, either I lash out against others or Myself. I feel the need to escape what I am feeling at that the person I am angry with wants me to fail, be misrable, and Not be Happy.. This is the best way I can explain it right now but I know it is something that needs strong examination as It is one of the most destructive behaviors I face Another Brief Piece I found on the Subject that May shed some Light )

 What is Raging?

Rage is a shame based expression
of anger. Rage is by definition abuse. Ragers react to strong emotions with
rage. (i.e. feelings of  fear, sadness, shame, inadequacy, guilt or loss convert
to rage.) Ragers were typically shamed or punished by
their caretakers for expressing emotion when they were young; i.e.: "Be a man
and don't cry", "Nice girls don't get angry";"I'll give you something to cry
about".Raging gives the rager a feeling of
power offsetting their shame and feelings of inadequacy .Rage sets
up a neurochemical reaction in the brain that can be addictive, producing what
is known as rageaholism or ragaholics,Screaming, physical expressions of anger, violence or threats of violence,
sulking, manipulation, emotional blackmail, silent smoldering, and anger used to
Healthy expression of anger involves confrontation of what makes you angry
and an effort to set  boundaries. (What you will do in response to what makes
you angry.) 
 When you (a behavior), I feel (a feeling) , and to protect myself I will
Healthy anger is not used to punish, is not violent, and isn't used to
intimidate, control or manipulate. It is expressed, discussed, and moved
through. Healthy anger is not stuffed down and ignored. (Stuffed anger
created resentment and a wealth of physical / mental and emotional problems.)
Healthy anger is not expressed in passive aggressive and manipulative ways.
Anger and Addictions">Unhealthy
Anger is component of Alcoholism, Addictions and Abusive Relationships. Anger management is critical to recovery from addictions and
trauma, childhood sexual mental or physical abuse, and relationship recovery. 
Addictions are in part a coping mechanism to deal with feelings by masking them.
Alcoholics and Addicts often "use at" the source of their
anger. (i.e.: I'm angry at ______ so I'll have a drink, take a drug, or act out
sexually.  Obviously this is a highly self destructive response to
anger.
<p><font><strong>Unexpressed anger related to childhood abuses</strong> often results
in addictive problems later in life. (To stuff down the feelings of shame,
anger, isolation, fear, sadness and loss the abuse creates.) Very often
chronic relapsers in recovery programs, or chronic addicts are survivors of
childhood abuse. The sad irony is that by pushing feelings down alcohol and drugs make it
impossible to work through our feelings and move past them, keeping the survivor
trapped in a downward spiral.&nbsp; This is part of why even moderate drug or alcohol
use in non addicts severely compromises their progress in therapy. (If you are
stuffing down your feelings how can you work on them?)
Regarding anger, the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous says:
It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to
futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we
squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic,
whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this
business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal. For when
harboring such feeling we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit.
The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to
die. If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch and the
brainstorm were not for us. They may be the dubious luxury of normal men, but
for alcoholics these things are poison."

R.C