Living on the Border !!!
About Me
Recent Posts
- Back again - same shit though
- My Hopeless decent into old ways
- The struggle within
- Always Seeking
- Help ( poem )
Menu
Calendar
| Mon | Tue | Wed | Thu | Fri | Sat | Sun |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | |
| 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 |
| 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 |
| 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 |
| 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | |||
Friends
Links
- My Wall
- bpdcentral
- Nimh BPD Info
- kci meth recovery community
- Another great and informative BPD site
- Meth recovery site
- My Other BPD site
Entry 1 of 338
Last Page | Next Page
3/24/2008
-
Alone and lacking a sense of self.
|
I got some things done on my laptop and then thought I would see how things were with my girl who was with her mom, she told me she would be home later when I called her and she said that she would tell me later about what Internet people said. I am so angry and upset after that call, I need to know now what is happening with getting Internet service, It frustrates me so much. I also say to myself that I want freedom but when I am not with her or others I feel so without a self, so empty. I have no idea what to do with myself, I could get drunk or high but I am trying to change all of that. I feel so not here or anywhere when I am stuck with only me. I feel so lonely but when I am around others I feel trapped and engulfed. I want to cut, I wnat to get smashed but I don"t. It is always raining in my head, when I finally get up some hope and think things are getting better then I free fall from my cloud and crash to the ground. The riddles confuse me, The pain never washes away, and I feel that emptiness creep up on me. |
Post A Comment! :: Send to a Friend! |
Permanent Link