It's a bit of an anticlimax this year. The Genootschap Onze Taal ('Society Our Language') has chosen a word of the year again, and the best they could come up with was twitteren ('to twitter'/'to tweet' as in posting tweets on Twitter). In a way it's better than last year's totally ridiculous winner, in a way it's worse. Last year's winner, if you'll remember from this same blog, was swaffelen ('to slap objects and/or people with the penis'). The main difference being, that last year anybody with access to a computer could vote, while this year voting was limited to members of the society only. Last year's vote of course having been stolen by online groups intent on messing up online votes. At least last year something more creative won.
The main rivals this year were kopvoddentaks ('headrag tax'), vuvuzela (a South African musical instrument that produces a monotonous sound) and vaccinatieangst ('fear of vaccinations'). Kopvoddentaks was coined by politician Geert Wilders who suggested that Muslim women who persist in wearing headscarves should be taxed 1000 euros a year for it. The vuvuzela was seen a lot in an international soccer tournament held in South Africa this past summer, and is bound to be seen again at next year's World Cup.
The most relevant word in this shortlist however would have been vaccinatieangst. Earlier this year a massive campaign was launched to vaccinate young girls (12-13) against cervical cancer. Immediately rumors were spread online about the dangers of the vaccine. According to the rumors the vaccine does more damage than good. Most of the rumors were spread by an organization called Kritisch prikken ('to jab with criticism'). It was soon revealed that this is an organization based in the heartland of Christian extremists who would rather have nobody be inocculated at all. They subsequently won the annual Meester Kackadoris quackery award, but the damage was done, and thousand of girls stayed away.
The Oxford Dictionary (hey, it's on my Amazon wishlist, people!), also chose an internet related word as its word of the year: to unfriend. Luckily it's something I don't have to incorporate into my day to day routine. If I even expect I might have to unfriend you at some stage in the future, I'm not going to add you to my social network in the first place.
As you know a lot of people are in doubt whether Barack Obama has done enough already to deserve his Nobel Peace Prize, and if the award should ever be given to encourage instead of reward. I have it on good authority that the Prize has been awarded as an encouragement on three previous occasions, but I do think it could have gone to a better laureate. Who? Well, how about the people of the United States?
Ha, but isn't that the gun-toting war mongering lot that got us in this mess in the first place. That bunch of KKK rednecks, etc.? Sure, but while we Europeans still feel superior, racism is far more open on our side of the herring pond. America now HAS a black president. Where are the non-white leaders in Europe? Also, the American people did vote for a man who promised to get us out of this mess, not someone who promised to plunge us deeper into it. Now Obama can go and deserve his award, the people of America have done their bit in providing him with the opportunity. Good luck Mr. President.
Saint Nicholas was in the news this week. He's due to arrive in this country in November, and this nationally televised Saturday afternoon extravaganza is causing very real problems, that I would not have imagined in a million years: there is no TV coverage of Saint Nicholas leaving on December 6, which causes distress and anxiety in autistic children. If they don't see him leave, they think he's still in the country, probably spying on them to find out whether they're being nice.
The public network that covers the arrival of the Saint are not unwilling to think about the situation, but say they can't do anything about it this year. That of course is rubbish. Every year they endeavor to corrupt the fragile souls of our young with weeks and weeks of mindless Saint Nicholas news bulletins in which the Saint must cope with horrible situations like finding housing for his thousands of helpers, storms at sea, etc. What trouble can it be to shoot five extra minutes of film in which he sets sail for his Lady of Spain once again? Fifteen minutes if you're filming weeks or months ahead and you want to get the weather right.
The news is also sort of comforting for me. I was once asked if there was any chance I was autistic. Even though there are many types of autism, I take this as one more piece of evidence I'm not.
It was touch and go yesterday for the liberal drug policy in my country. There was a vote on whether or not coffeeshops, the places where you can use cannabis in public without being arrested, should be tolerated any longer. They did come out on the safe side, but there are going to be changes.
The main problem with coffeeshops is the fact that visitors, and especially tourists, have become a nuisance. They're loud, violent, they litter, etc. The axe has fallen to their disadvantage. From now on, coffeeshops no longer have to admit them, and in order to discourage them even further from admitting 'outsiders', the tolerated amount of drugs these establishments can possess at any time will be limited further. Coffeeshops will also have to operate on a membership basis, with local members only.
Even though I would have preferred all-out legalization (which you sadly can't do as one country), I'm very glad that this might well mean an end to all those themed coffeeshops that make Amsterdam such an ugly place.
Don't worry Mr. O'Reilly, we do still have legal prostitution and gay marriage in this country. Enough to corrupt your countrymen, and to keep you ranting and raving on Fox News. We wouldn't know how to go on living without you.
If there is anyone on television worldwide I can't stand, it's Antoinette Hertsenberg. She hosts TROS Radar, a TV show about companies that don't respect the rights of consumers. A noble cause, but there is no need for her to act like the Wicked Witch of the East. Also, TROS is a broadcaster that forces upon its viewers a false sense of being one big family, an idea propagated by some of the most evil dictators in human history. But, last Monday she almost redeemed herself with one of the best shows she has ever done.
The theme of the show was the medical industry, and its unlawful ways of advertising. They showed exactly how the industry tries to sell its products. They chose an affliction everybody suffers from, but few people really care about and started a campaign for more awareness, about... flatulence (a wasted buildup... the header sort of gave it away). Everybody passes wind dozens of times a day, but they appealed to a sense of shame, and advised people to go to their doctors.
First they engaged TNS Nipo, the most respected market research agency in the country. Instead of doing fair market research, the agency immediately made suggestions about the way to go for maximum exposure. The results showed a very high percentage of our population is worried if not ashamed by their own flatulence. It made headlines across the country, and it was covered on the news, etc. They started a website, left flyers and posters in the offices of enthusiastic general practitioners, etc. Everything was clearly as it shouldn't be, but everybody fell for it. It's been awhile since I've laughed out this loudly about a serious program. Still, knowing that this is how it always works with the industry, it's also pretty sad.
The biggest story in the news this week: a 13-year-old Dutch girl is planning to set sail next Tuesday, and become the youngest person to ever circumnavigate the world. This prompted the authorities to start a huge media campaign to let the country know they don't approve. On Friday, a judge will decide whether custody over the girl should be lifted from her parents, and the girl has threatened to use the fact that she has triple nationalities, and emigrate to New Zealand, where the judge's decision won't affect her.
Even though I'm sure science is absolutely right, and a 13-year-old girl doesn't have the mental capacities to decide what's good for her, she should be allowed to go. Just make her parents responsible for everything. If she dies along the way, her parents should serve the maximum sentence for involuntary manslaughter of a minor, for instance. In this country it's probably a suspended sentence of six months thru a year, but they could put them on a register for people who committed crimes against children. Plus, any sentence will restrict their freedom to move around the world. Also, if she fails to have a highschool diploma by the age of eighteen, her parents should be made responsible for her financial future. If she ever finds herself underqualified to work, or just plain laid off, her welfare checks should come straight from her parents, who of course, will also have bought the most expensive life insurance available for themselves. If the governments of Germany, New Zealand, and the Netherlands can agree upon this I see no objections.
On the other hand, the attentions she generates is regrettable. Another immature role model for the immature people of this country. After Hillary Duff, Highschool Musical I thru XXVII, and the like, I'm not sure we need her as well. I do not share the worries about the possibility that her social skills might not develop properly in the two years she'll be on her own. If I'm to believe a recent TV report the many kids who game for hours every day, and who only communicate thru texting, twitter, MSN, etc., won't end up any better than her.
A huge campaign has just been launched in my country to get people to toss their lightbulbs, and replace them with LED lights. In a few days the sale of old-fashioned lightbulbs will be forbidden, because they are going to kill the planet in the long run, if allowed to continue festering like they've done for the last, what, 150 years? I suppose we went bonkers (as they call it on the east coast), because we have already replaced most lightbulbs in the house. LED lights do come very cheap. The energy saver lights that we've had for years are easily four, five times more expensive. The new energy efficiency of LED lights became apparent the moment I turned the lights on, let me tell you. I can't distinguish my black from my blue in the twilight they emit. It's easy on the eyes when reading, watching TV, etc., but if you have to do something important, do it in the daytime.
The Dutch premier league soccer season kicks off tomorrow night, but if you ask me, they needn't bother. The goal of the season has already been scored. You can watch it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b_5os1C_9Qs. The player who scores is Ismail Aissati of Ajax Amsterdam, a club I absolutely loathe. Why then, am I so thrilled by this goal? He shoots the ball into his own net, and the way he does it is just fabulous. He'll never hear the end of this one, hehe.
It's not easy being Queen. First the suicide attack on Queen's Day, and now the Vegan Streaker. Or so the police think. He was arrested yesterday for plotting against the Queen. He apparently wants to shoot her. I could give his full name, but his lawyer is Gerard Spong, and he's not one to let a chance to sue go by that easily.
"Vegan Streaker" is actually too much glory as a nickname for the guy. He's known mostly for invading a TV show in the Netherlands, and later one in Belgium, but he didn't take his underpants off. The host of the Dutch show actually tried to undress him, but Mr. Streaker didn't go for that. If I remember correctly he tried to go to the cops to press charges. Some streaker, eh?
On a related note, today there is national holiday in Belgium, and yes, there have been threats against the Belgian royal family. Against Queen Fabiola, the widow of former King Baudoin, to be precise. The Copycat Syndrome reaches beyond our borders.
Quite a stir at the library this week. A book entitled Godverdomse dagen op een godverdomse bol (translation: goddamned days on a goddamned sphere) won one of the top literary awards in the Dutch language, the Libris Literatuurprijs. We have a small contingent of Christian fundamentalists in this town, and they all seem to be members of the library. the librarians are fearing the worst.
I buy a lot of written off books from this library. Mostly non-fiction though. Sadly, the reason for most fiction to be written off is this band of fundies. They go thru all the books with a black marker and censor every swearword, every reference to the devil (and they have a broad view of what the devil is), and all blasphemy. Some books are reduced to mere barcodes. Now that this book has won the award, there are fears that all copies will be attacked very soon.
There is one positive. This is just one title, so it can be tracked quite easily. Every time it is returned, they can just check for black stripes, and catch the last person who borrowed it.
I haven't read the book myself yet, but I've been led to believe that it's about the entire history of mankind, described from the viewpoint that life on earth is nothing more than a happy accident. The Flemish author is Dimitri Verhulst.
I'm baaack! Been busy doing other things online, but today I thought I might post a new blog entry. It's Queen's Day in my country. Normally the Queen then visits two towns to indulge herself in folkloristic games, that are shown live on national television. This year she didn't quite make it. Oh, don't worry, she's alright, but it was a close shave. A black Suzuki ploughed its way thru the crowd and crashed into a monumental sculpture only a few dozen yards before a coach carrying her majesty and several other royals would pass the site. Two confirmed dead, and 23 injured.
I'm spending the day in a town called Driebergen (my sister lives here), where I visited one of the many flea markets that are held today throughout the country. The flea market was also swarmed by a good number of men in black suits with orange ties, who are members of the local Orange Society (an organization for royalist nutters). One of them was close to tears when the news emerged that the Royal Family had narrowly escaped a 'terrorist plot', saying that he could not believe such a thing could have happened on "F*ing Queen's Day", saying any other day would have been OK, but not "f*ing Queen's Day!"
A lot of festivities have either been canceled or severely reduced, so I fear I'm going to have a hell of a problem a bit later on, trying to make my way home by way of both Utrecht, and Amsterdam. two major cities in the Netherlands. Wish me luck!
There they were again, on Friday, back in the spotlight, the Tokkie family. Complaining on a news show that should be above this, that their name is being slandered. It wasn't even their victim namesakes who complained, it was the guilty Tokkies themselves.
What happened is that Rotterdam has decided that some residential areas need to be protected, and that people who have terrorized other neighborhoods in the past should not be allowed. It's the first city in the country that has started doing background checks. Some newspapers remembered the Tokkies from a few years ago, and dubbed these background checks, the "Tokkie test".
Who are these Tokkies? Well, these particular elements in the Tokkie family, were the neighbors from hell a couple of years ago, but they felt they were being victimized themselves. The media gratefully jumped in to tell their story, which included a reality TV show about their lives, a public search for a new home, after they had their old house burnt down. After a long time, maybe over six months, the attention for them finally died down, and they started enjoying the money the TV show had generated.
Until... Suddenly... Two newspapers had the audacity to create the worth Tokkie test. Which led them to try to very publicly demand that they be left alone, and their name not be used in puns.
Now, if an innocent Tokkie reads this, feels offended, and wants to sue, I mean I know how people can be when they find out your name, of course you can try suing me, but why not sue the ones ultimately responsible for your ordeal. It was them who put you in this situation, not me.
Three years ago Enkhuizen celebrated its 650th anniversary as a city. This was quite an arbitrary celebration, as the Netherlands officially has no cities, but its the only thing that can be celebrated, because nobody really knows how old the town really is. And it could be pretty old. Only last week there was big news from the town I live in, which made the nationwide news. At the site of a projected residencial area in the north of Enkhuizen, archeologists have found houses, stables, wells, and even a church with a sign in runes saying Saint Mary's by the Lake, that date back to approximately 1300 BC, when the Bronze Age was still raging in Europe.
I should have know this, of course. Enkhuizen is only THE antithesis to evolution. If you take the top twenty most common family names in town, they all fit the description of neanderthals. I even spotted a few cro magnons. You could swear that the creationists are right.
Oh um... the church, Saint Mary's by the Lake, is of course a joke. It's April Fools Day tomorrow. I can't help it. It wasn't a lake back in those days, but more of a sound or inlet. The sign really said Saint Mary's by the Sound. Just kidding.
I wrote an entry about Friday the 13th before, in which I listed all the Dutch superstitions I knew about. There weren't a whole lot of them, if you remember. Far less than one would expect, knowing it all goes back to Jesus on the cross. Jesus on the cross!?!?!?! Indeed, that has nothing to do with it, or at least, it doesn't go back that far. A Dutch student has investigated it, and she found out that the earliest mention in the Netherlands that has anything to do with Friday the 13 superstition dates back to 1896, and in English no earlier reference was found than 1869. In fact, in the Anglo-Saxon world it wasn't popularized until a 1907 novel, while in the Netherlands we needed the movie Friday the 13th to get us all worked up about it.
Nobody can deny the advantage of having such superstitions, however. In the Netherlands the average number of damage reports in traffic on Friday the 13th is slightly lower than on average Fridays, which could very well mean, that some drivers are driving more carefully.
I learned a disturbing fact this week. I'm not sure about the American term for it, but in the UK the money I pay, so I can watch TV, is called a 'license fee'. This week I learned that a good portion actually goes to paying to be allowed to see advertising. Commercial logos, and indeed commercials themselves are, of course, copyrighted, but since they are intended to brainwash the public into buying stuff we don't really need, I assumed that we were getting them for free. No such luck. I wonder what portion of local taxes goes into supporting my local billboards. I'd be happy to learn about the situation in other countries, so if you know...
I posted an entry before about the Westboro Baptist Church, and their hate sites directed at different countries, that they feel enable homosexuality. At that point I felt offended that there was no "God Hates the Netherlands" site. There is now. Still, their evidence is a bit dodgy. They made a huge point out of that Turkish Airlines crash near Amsterdam Airport, a few weeks ago. You can't say THAT really hurt the Netherlands, though. There were nine fatalities, five Turkish, and four American. Also the plane crashed in a field, that didn't look like it was used for anything useful. Still, there is that one survivor whose condition is still critical. Wow, it really feels like the wrath of the LORD has come over me. Anyways, if you wish to read the Phelpses' newest filth, you can find it here: http://www.godhatestheworld.com/netherlands/filthymanneroflife.html.
It's official, God has a cellphone. It has a Dutch number, 0644244901. If you wish to call from North America, and most Caribbean islands, you dial 01131644244901, from European countries, that would be 0031644244901. If you call Him, you will get a taped message in the Dutch language, with an unpleasant regional accent, saying "I am not around at the moment", and asking you to leave a prayer, and maybe He might grant your wish.
Apparently it's an art project, but to me it sounds more like an atheist's sense of christian humor. The whole idea is flawed. God is omnipresent, so just a prayer should be enough to reach Him, and His absence defeats the entire purpose of cellphones. Also, one of the things about christians (excluding some of those rockstar evangelicals who want to sell books, so they can buy a Hummer) I sort of appreciate is that they offer you their version of the truth for free (which can't be said for some of my fellow atheists), and saying prayers has always been free as well, but if you call this number, you will be charged money.
If you do it right a prayer can be very much like meditation, which is a very pleasant activity, believe you me, and leaving your prayer on a cellphone very much diminishes that particular quality.
I wonder if the guy who created God's cellphone is a christian himself. That's something I haven't been able to find out. Oh well, first and foremost I just hope it's not another escalation of the Darwin Year shouting contest.
Whether or not he's a fraud, we'll never know. But... what a whiner. At present I'm a follower of the second season of a show called 'The Next Uri Geller'. It's a rather enjoyable show, and you're constantly tossed around between asking yourself, is this just illusionism, or could it be real? There is one disturbing factor however, no two, but let's not get into the Patty Brard factor. There are no words in the English language to describe her. The disturbing factor I wish to talk about is His Imperial Bendyspoonness himself.
First of all, it is a show about mentalism, right? And to demonstrate the power of the mind, you sometimes want to show something dangerous, or else nobody watches. Yet, everytime someone does something where someone could get an earlobe pierced, Mr. Geller keeps shouting, yes, SHOUTING, that it was dangerous, and this is a family show, and there are kids watching... Yet at the beginning of each show, and at the end of each commercial break, the viewing public is properly warned that there are dangerous acts going on, which, incidentally, are never to be tried at home. Do it at someone else's place. If people don't want their kids to see anything dangerous, they don't have to let their kids watch, do they?
Then there is this one contestant, a Belgian guy by the name of Vincent. He wants to prove thru his performances, that vampires are real. His acts are gross, and he works with blood and leeches, but there is a clear mentalist aspect to his shows. That is more than can be said for certain others, whose tricks, minus the swords and chainsaws, do appear in magic books written for ten year old novices to the art of illusionism. Uri Geller has repeatedly walked off when Vincent was doing his thing, and has attempted to tell him off, although he completely lacks the linguistic capacities to impress Vincent even mildly. His latest attempt to get thru to Vincent came in the form of a large bundle of garlic...
Another example comes from last Friday's show. There is a masked contestant whose identity is being kept a mystery (are you watching Geert Wilders... someone is trying to hide his identity). On Friday, a few people wearing masks and robes of their own ran onto the stage to reveal the Mask's identity. The way Uri Geller reacted, I have a distinct feeling that this was all prearranged. He reacted just a little bit too well.
The worst thing about it all are Uri Geller's own demonstrations. They clearly do all come from the Fool's Guide to Boring Parlor Tricks. Let's see if this works, for instance. In my mind I am picturing a photograph of a building in a European capital. Anyone who reads this, post a comment, and name the city, and the building. It doesn't matter if you (are made by me, to) think of the same city and building as anyone who has posted a comment before you. At least 75% should get it right. Even if no one posts a comment, I will tell you the correct answer in a comment of my own on Tuesday.
As some of my readers know, one of my email accounts was invaded last month, or maybe in November. I discovered someone generating spam messages even as I was online, and sending them to people on my contact list. I now know what exactly was going on. I used that email address to sign up for a site, and used the same password I use to sign in to the email account. Someone working for the site has been using this information. I immediately changed my passwords and deactivated the inbox. The cops have this bastard now, and I have reactivated the account, so people can email me there again. I'm glad it wasn't some kind of virus or spyware. The only lesson I had to draw from this is to further diversify my passwords.
Coldcoldcoldcoldcold. Well, not where I live, but the rest of Europe seems to be freezing to shreds. That goes for most of my country as well, but a vast portion of the north, including the place I live in, is escaping the worst of it. We haven't had it much colder than the mid-twenties, while parts of the southern Netherlands have had subzero temperatures. I have experienced such temperatures before, but these past few years, we really haven't had winters, so it's something which I need to get used to again. The coldest winter I remember was the 1996-'97 edition.
It's good fun, though. For the first time in years the ice is thick enough to skate on, and everybody is doing it. This did cause chaos in the train system yesterday, as people shamelessly ran over the tracks with their skates on (we call that 'klunen'), to get from one body of water to another one. There were no injuries despite the thick layer of fog that did cover most of the country. On the upside we had the first national ice skating championships on natural ice in twelve winters, and a guy who lives three miles away from here won the men's race. Tomorrow and Sunday will even see the first ice sailing championships in years.
People are also carefully speculating about the possibility of an 'Elfstedentocht', which is a historic 130 mile race in the northern province of Friesland. The race is 100 years old, and so far there have been 15 installments, the most recent one dating back to early January 1997. It is the number one indication of a memorable winter in this country. No Elfstedentocht, no reason to remember a winter. It's not too likely we'll have one this year. It takes ten days and nights of temperatures way below thirty degrees, and so far in that part of the country, the daytime temperatures have spoilt the fun. For those who are wondering how many days it takes for the top skaters to skate the race in its entirety, the last winner, Henk Angenent, did it in approximately six and a half hours.
On the other hand, I highly doubt people from the Southern province of Limburg will forget this winter soon. The plumming froze to bits earlier this week, and it took the water company a long time to fix it.
No, I haven't returned to MySpace. This acquaintance goes back eleven years.
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Unword of the Year
nominated for 2009:
YAWN RAPE
Previous winners
* 2008 - Dog grooming porno
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My top 3 of favorite search terms that have directed visitors to my blog
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Blogthings
You are Sandusky, OH
Loser! You are boring, have no sense of adventure, no sense of humor, you have no friends, in fact you're no good to this world. You are definitely Sandusky, OH!
Famous Sandusky, Ohio, residents: probably a few hockey players, but no one worth a second glance
* Soraya
