saturday yay,

its saturday woowho...i slept in today, oh i love being at home..maybe a little to much i think..but perhaps its a good thing cause if i stayed in glaway at the weekends all id do is drink...im sitting in my kitchen at home listening to jack johnston, oh he rocks!!
had a class pary on thursday, it was mad! just stayed for awhile cause babs was with me and she felt kinda left out so we left! oh my class mates are mad, tracy is sooo fine, ah  i hate straight girls..its no fair ..but i guees its a good thing shes straight cause im just couldnt handle getting emotionally involved with anyone right now....its wierd i think im growing up, but perhaps heartace makes you more cautious, next time you wont be so open..i guess your more afraid!

i watched "the eternal sunshine of a spotless mind" last nite..it was soo good, so sad...i kept thinking of "whats her namE" and i asked meyself would i erase her from my memory?? dispite how much it hurts no i wouldnt!! theyll be more, no time soon but theyre will be and as she thought me to stop taking life so seriously and just relax..i said some hurtful things to her but i was just showing my fustration, perhaps with time well realy talk again....but im goiong to hold my breath, she reminds me of me when i first came out, so insercure, so confused, so fragile...im no saying im all mended, but know what i want, i know i like girls, i can label myself, i always said i neverliked lebels but sometimes you need sometihng to hold onto...

..on a lighter note, mammys going to boston tuesday which reminds me i must write my aunt a letter, she no longer has cancer but shes deaf so i thought it would be nice to write a letter, she doesnt no mums going over to see her which will be cool..ah i wish i was going over to see my cousins, and drink around dorchester with my uncle in his bmw and leahter seat...ah that was so cool last time i was over...well i got l;oads to do and so little time..

peace out

bernie

1:53 PM - 10/15/2005 - post comment