This week has been an overload. I know more is to come this week. At least I had Sunday off, although chores don't really constitute a 'day off ...

Fatigue set in yesterday. Olivia is at her Grandpa Richard's house spending some quality time while I studied for my Property & Casualy licensing course, did laundry, cleaned the house, organized the bills, attempted to move Olivia's crib into my room until I realized I don't have the tools.

Asi es la vida.

I have to run some errands. I filled out most of the paperwork for my Family Health Plus / Child Health Plus NY DSS renewal application. I have a ton of copies to make all due by 7/31/06.

Jim send up more money that should be in transit. Makes me wonder how much he loves his family. I couldn't be away. Couldn't. It makes me depressed to know he chose smokine weed over his family. But, that was his priority. His choice. I am killing myself sleeping <4hours/night, working full time, raising a child, maintaining a household. I'm beat. But, I know I'm doing what I'm doing for the good of my family.

Jim's got contacts up here and a place to stay, if he decides his family is important enough. He would have to quit smoking in order to get a decent job, something he needs to weigh for himself. I can't make him make the right choices. I can want him to, but that won't change the hurt I feel.

Maybe I'm just too overwhelmed to think clearly, or maybe my self-sacraficing is making my think more about what I'm willing to do for my family.