10/22/2006 - Suffering like Job

My daughter just had a miscarriage and after all our joy to see her becoming a mom one day soon, we went with her through all kinds of thoughts and questions about the meaning of life and death. With my daughter I was reminded how sudden sometimes our life can change. It felt like she walked one way with the smile on her face and someone grabbed her against her will and made her walk back from where she just came. But the way back had to be done with pain, bleeding and weeping.

Her doctor said that seven women out of ten lose their first pregnancy and it shocked us. That many? We never knew that! Why women end in situations when they are not in charge of their own bodies and someone decides for them what is going to happen?! To those women I dedicate this song.

Job’s Song

I prostrate myself, and pray and pray

On the floor and on my knees.

And while I pray, I hear you say,

"Do you know who I AM?"

Chorus in a rock style:

I don’t care who you say you are

How dare did you take away what was mine?!

I find no more ashes to hide my pain

I lost all my friends, who saw my shame...

I hide my eyes, and look and cry

For the One, who promised me

Is all you said was just a lie

Or that’s all you had for me?

Chorus:

I prostrate myself, and I hear you speak

"Do you know who I am?

I created you to be tough not weak

It’s enough for you to grieve."

Chorus:

I stood up and saw that life is good

Though bad things happen too

Here I am strong and whole again

This dark place is not to stay.

New Chorus for the ending:

And now I care who you say you are

I dare to find what you have for me

I need no more ashes to hide my pain

I won’t use your name in vain again... only when I pray.