All's quiet on the A. front - the last 2 nights he's been home early ie. within 2 hours of finishing work. Not because he understood that i was getting more than a little bit pissed off with him, but because he's skint. No money means no trips to the pub after work, and as i've flat out refused to lend him any more money, he'll have to wait til payday - which is Friday. Which probably means that we won't see him before midnight :( Oh well!

The thing that's bugging me - it has a name, Serena, 18 year old wannabe goth, who apparently has a bit of a crush on A., and whose house he was at on Friday night when he didn't bother coming home. Ridiculous i know, to let it bother me, but it does. I'm sure it's all one way, but she doesn't have rheumatoid arthritis and she can can do whatever she wants - and i can't. It's at times like this having R.A. really pises me off and i sink into that "why me" way of thinking. I was diagnosed when i was 18 but for the first 10 years or so, it never really hit me what i have. I went out and partied with the best of them, got blindingly drunk - a lot! - and even stupidly got married (won't be doing that again in a hurry) - but it never stopped me doing anything. Do you know what gets me most now? The fact i can't even put my own stupid socks on! And that i can't have a real bath but have to perch on a stupid board :(

Anyway, that's enough moaning, if i carry on thinking like this, i'll just get more and more down. And i can't be down, it's Christmas! Bah humbug! Actually, today is Winter Solstice, it's the shortest day/longest night of the year! From tomorrow, it'll start getting lighter earlier and darker later, which means my favourite time of year is only here for a couple more months.

Off to something Christmassy - wrap some presents and maybe even put the decs up! :D