The value of a parenting guide rests upon two basic ideas that are implied in the phrase. In the first place the word 'parent' means someone who has a child. When 'ing' is affixed to the noun it becomes a gerund, or verbal noun entailing an element of action. Being a parent cannot be passive, even if a dozen nannies are employed. The act of employing the nannies is a parental act.

Being and acting as a parent begins at conception and ends when a person expires. It is a mistake to think that the implications of parenting end when a child leaves the nest. He or she will come home for a while or it will not. Either way the actions say something about the parent child relationship which will last throughout life. In some cases the most difficult phase will come towards the end of life when a parent must submit to either being ignored or treated like a child by his children.

The second concept is in the word 'guide'. This is someone who can show something but not do it for the client. It is certainly a help to have a guide show one around a site, or lead one along a trail but that is not the same as actually appreciating a cathedral or completing a trail in the face of fatigue and blisters. When a child fails to come home on time the usefulness of a guide fades in the face of urgent reality.

In practise, a helpful publication or online site will focus on the period of life when parenting problems and challenges are at their most intense. Between birth and adolescence the relationships between children and parents quiver with energy and achievements. The acquisition of mother tongue competence in the first two years of life is an intellectual miracle and in the next few years, until the age of six or seven, moral and emotional foundations are laid down to form the base upon which future growth and development is laid.

Most parents grow to appreciate the enormity of their task soon after they have brought their infant home from hospital and are faced with the task of keeping the little thread of life alive. Perhaps it is fortunate that they don't at first think too much about the longevity of a relationship that will last until death because the immediate challenges are sufficient unto the days (and nights) that they face.

Childhood is dynamic. Growth and development cannot be arrested and when some parents try to do that by instinctively allowing their protective instincts to get out of hand they can destroy a child's life. Conversely, neglect is a crime. The balance between letting go and holding on is at the heart of good parenting but hardly anyone gets it right all the time. Therein lies one reason why a good parenting guide is valuable.

All parents have to cope with intractable problems. They may proceed from colic and doubts about a child's intelligence to disobedience, lying, cheating and other horrifying tendencies that may emerge at adolescence even when a child has received an ideal early education. This is because adolescence is the phase when independence must be established.

A parenting guide is indispensable whether it comes in the form of a grandparent's homilies or an online publication. However, all advice must be received and applied in particular contexts. Very often parents may turn to a guide only after mistakes have been made. However, if they have respected, loved and honored their child's moral and spiritual independence since birth they will stand a better chance of applying parenting principles wisely.