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My Life As A Girl

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A journey through life filled with ups and downs, laughter and tears, and most definitely alot of drama...

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Monday, April 14, 2008 - . (Full Stop)

I found a new obsession.

This obsession is by far, the most interesting obsession i've ever been obsessed with. In fact, it's so interesting, i wouldn't call it an obsession anymore. It's more like a hobby. No, it's a way of life...

It's to stare at So Ji Sup's beautiful face and listen to "Noon Eh Ggot" (Yuki No Hana aka "I'm Sorry, I Love You" theme song)
It's been 2 days and all i can think about is his face. I know that sounds so lame and pathetic and sick.... but here it is, the highlight of my life. The way i keep myself sane and awake. If i don't do all these funny, crazy things i would go crazy and dig a hole and bury myself.

It has been a very miserable week. Miserable month. No, actually to be frank, it has been a totally fucked up year and it's only April. I 'can't wait' till this year is over. I wonder how much miserable next year will be.

After my mummy & dad came back from the States, i thought that my life will finally return back to normal. You know, a life where i can find some light and at least some decent social life, but no. It hasn't been that way at all. First of all, my crazy lecturer decided to be a mean bastard and give us 4 (F.O.U.R) assignments in ONE FREAKING WEEK!

Which i, of course put off till the very last minute (as usual) because i didn't have the stupid CS3 program inside my comp, which brought me to my second disaster. So after work last Saturday, before i went to meet up with my college mates for lunch, i decided to head over to Uptown (nearby my college) to see if the DVD shop was open and wanted to check out if they sell any CS3 programes CD. I couldn't find out because when i reached there, the stupid shop was closed!

So, as i was driving to SS2 to meet my college mates, i was stopped at a T-Junction, waiting patiently and innocently for another car to drive pass when this stupid man crashed into the back of my car!!!! Not only i had the biggest shock of my life due to the impact, i sprained my neck & got a blueblack on my arm!!!!!

My car wasn't totally wrecked, which he was lucky (because if it was, i would have clobbered him with what was left with my once beautiful kangaroo bar) He of course, agreed to pay for my car and after getting all the necessary details and contact numbers, i drove shakily (with my knight in shinning armor college mate who sped all the way when i called to say i had an accident.) to SS2, which i of course developed a huge headache, and then got lectured by my mum because of the accident.

Then i forgotten my lap top had no more battery which was totally frustrating because we wanted to load something to my laptop and we had to 'steal' the plug to charge my lap top. (And was totally frustrated with those two bimbos in CoffeeBean!!!)

By the end of the day, i was ready to kill myself.

And then i found out my handphone is fucked up. As in seriously FUCKED UP!! Suddenly, oh so suddenly i couldn't type. I couldn't press the keypad. The only button that i could press was to answer and to reject the phone call. I was so frustrated.

Why God, why are You playing with my life?
Don't You know i'm on the verge of breaking down? Is this a test? To test my loyalty? To test my faith? To test how strong i am?

I give up. White flag. *wave wave wave*

In conclusion,

work sucks...colleagues (some) are fucked up, college sucks, life sucks..and my mom is currently harassing me. I'm going to blow.
Right about now.

.

Can this be a full stop?

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Tuesday, April 1, 2008 - Employed by the BIG 'B'!!

My boss is a disgusting, heartless, unprofessional, stubborn, forgetful, sarcastic, impatient, ridiculous, unreasonable, accusive, disrespectful and loud witch. She is really.

Sometimes i just want to look at her with pity and tell her I'm sorry that she has such a low-respect life, but sometimes i just want to take the freaking vase and bash it against her head again and again and again and then flush her head in the toilet and ask her to rot in hell.

She is so hypocritical, and so rude and selfish and bossy that i can't stand her. Just because she's the one giving us our cheques, but she doesn't have to be all high and mighty and try to rule our lives!! Who died and made her King?

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Whatever, she's a freaking bitch and i can't stand her. I love my job, i like my colleagues (well...some of them) and i love what i'm doing, but having to see her fucked up face everyday, and having her breathe down my neck every single minute while i'm trying to do my job is seriously disturbing. And frankly, i can't wait till the day i hand in my resignation letter to her. I want to sit down, and see her expression and i want to enjoy that moment for the rest of my life.

And on my last day, i want to really, really look at her in the eye, and say "Good Luck...in everything you do." really really really sarcastically until she feels the pinch. And then i'm just going to walk out from that freaking place and never look back.

3 more months. 3 more months and i'm out from there!!!!!!!!!

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Saturday, March 29, 2008 - They're BACK!!!

Yay! Life is normal back again! Finally!!
After 1 month of suffering, my parents are finally back and i can finally come home from work, dead tired and not caring about feeding the cat, or taking in the mail, or washing the clothes, or if it has been raining would the electricity be out and worst of all, food.

My parents are finally back. Picked them up from the airport this morning and when i saw them walking out from the arrival gate i wanted to yell for joy. YAY!!

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Now, i want to go get some well deserved TLC from them.

Maybe i can get my mum to make me a glass of fresh orange juice!
:)

AdioS!!

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Friday, March 21, 2008 - Comp Graphics - Assignment 3 DONE!!!!!

*sigh*

It's 5.05 AM now and i'm still stuck doing the stupid assignment. Ok ok, so I didn't do it yesterday like I promised myself I would since it was a public holiday and I had the whole day to do it and of course, as usual I would only start doing at the very last minute which was at 12.30 this morning.

I have 2 hours before i absolutely have to finish it because I have to leave for work by then and then work ends at 5.30 and class starts at 7..not exactly a lot of time left for me to complete it.

But I'm kinda happy with the progress so far. Have finished about 90%. This stupid assignment is called Vector Potrait and it freaking sucks. Basically I chosed Kate Beckinsale's high res picture and then i drew a potrait of her. Using Illustrator CS3. Sounds easy? Not really.

I hate Illustrator. I hate drawing.

And I'm beginning to hate Kate Beckinsale.

Okay, it's nearly 6 AM now..i'm finally done...

I chosed this picture.

I know, she looks absolutely stunning.

And i turned her into a monster.

See...?

I'm so happy I'm finally done. Now i don't have to stare at Kate's face anymore. It's finisto. YAY!!!!!!!

YAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I'm kinda thinking of doing another tattoo. Been thinking about it for a while now and yesterday during a yum char session with Nukie and the rest, she told me that she wants to do a tattoo as well! GREAT!!! At least now there's someone who will do it with me. :)

I'm wondering what design to do now and where to do it. I was thinking of this:

at the back of my shoulders. But am not sure yet... we'll see how it goes.

It's 6.08 AM now, going to take my shower and get ready for work.

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Wednesday, March 19, 2008 - Guys alike

I'm furious.

Extremely furious. Sure, we aren't together or anything, but we have that special friendship - the kind of relationship many people won't understand. But he is the one i turn to ask my many silly questions but he has always listened to them, and sometimes even when he doesn't have the answer to it, he still manage to make me feel like my quesion isn't dumb at all and make me understand things better. He somehow made me see things in a different persepective.

And he is the one guy who has always treated me like a woman. Someone who didn't take me as another immature 21 years old bimbo. He always made me feel grown up and important (i know that sounds totally insane) but he just have that kind of effect on me. And sometimes i wish if given the chance to change the time and place, we'd probably end up being a very happy couple. At least that's what he has told me before anyways. I know there's no way in this world we'd be together but i love being with him because he makes me feel complete.

So when he was acting all funny and weird yesterday, i got a little worried. We were texting each other and here's basically how our conversation went.

Him: I'm tired Mich...of living... Goodnight.

Me: HUH? Are you okay?

Him: Ok tq...Pls pls take good care of youself...tks for all your care.

Me: What's wrong? Something happened? Anything i can do? You are making me worry

Him: Tq Mich..I'm trying to sleep but kinda hard. Pls don't worry. Am not good, but am ok.

Me: How can i not worry?

Him: Nothing for you to worried about. I don't plan to die...yet...Not now anyways. Pls take good care

That's when i called him. And that's when he didn't answer my calls. Then he texted me "Take care pls Mich...whatever you do, wherever you are...goodnight." I was so worried about him but thought that maybe he was just tired and had a bad day. So the next day, (today) he didn't even text me or call me the whole day (he will always text me in the morning and in the evening and before he goes to sleep)

Was so concerned, i texted him and asked how he was feeling.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT HE REPLIED!!!?????

"Am ok. At &%@^ (A bar's name), drunk. U ok?"

Almost immediately i felt like screaming.
You don't go around one day telling people you're tired of life and making people assume you're gonna do something stupid but yet not telling them anything and not even bothering to call or even at least a message to tell them that you're ok and safe and then tell them the next day that you're out at some stupid bar drinking and getting drunk!!

That's just not right!!!! I was so frustrated and so irritated and so pissed that i was so blardy sarcastic when replying him. But that PIG DIDN'T EVEN REALIZED!!! And that made me so much more frustrated and irritated and pissed that i was about to blow up if i weren't in the office with a stack of files in front of me, just waiting for me to work on them.

And then when he finally realized i was pissed, he started apologising and when i asked him why was he apologising, he had the CHEEK TO IGNORE MY QUESTION!!

And just like that, for the first time since i've got to know him, i had no mood whatsoever to talk to him or even read his messages.

FRUSTRATING!!!

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Tuesday, March 18, 2008 - I'm BACK

I can't believe i didn't blogged for so long. Seems insanely fast how time flew. It's now March 2008. It's been nearly a year since i've last blogged.

1 year!!!

Has it been a year? Already? Holy cow. I'm so old man!!!

Alot of things have happened in this 1 year, if i were to write it one by one, i wouldn't be able to finish till... next year! To cut a long story short, as mentioned in my last entry - Marketing was such a bore, but i have passed both papers, with flying colours i might add. *hee hee*. Also, have completed my Advertising Campaign Planning (ACP) & Graphic Design papers and have passed that as well.

Currently (and suffering) doing my Computer Graphics paper. After this, i'm done. Done with my Diploma.

Life's still pretty much the same boring sh*t... BTW, i did get a job which i pretty much like, except that my boss is kinda crazy sometimes. I think she's suffering from some long & short term memory loss. Then she throws a hissy fit when something she did or said happens but she forgotten that she did or said that, get what i mean? So yeah, it's tough having a lady boss but i pretty much ignore her when she's having a bad mood...which is pretty much everyday. Geeshh..

My love life still is pretty much the same... i think i'm doomed to grow old alone. I don't know why i can't seem to find a right one. And when i think i have found someone i might like, i find out he's either A) Attached B) Gay C) Attached AND Gay
and that is pretty frustrating you know.

Oh well, frustrating strories aside now.

Unbelievably, i'm leaving to Aussie in 3 months. Going to tha down under baby. Finally. Can't wait to leave, but yet i'm feeling kinda depressed. Gonna miss my mum so badly. My dad and grandmother and my friends.

*sigh*

But we all have to go through that, don't we? It's like...leaving home to prove to yourself that you've grown up? That you can do it on you own?
You don't need mummy to wake you up, or wash or cook for you anymore. You're 21, you can take life's shit thrown at you with your head held up high?

I'm a little nervous. And scared. Okay, i admit, i'm a little freaked out. I'm not only going to leave home, i'm going to leave the country...stepping into a foreign country, all by myself- no friends, no family...all by myself, starting a new life, studying and getting a job, doing the cooking, washing, cleaning and everything by myself.

Okay, officially freaking out right now.

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Wednesday, May 9, 2007 - Please Please Pretty Pretty Please

It's been 44 hours since i've had the interview in Sony.

My dream job.

Please, oh please don't leave me in this misery. Please tell me i got the job and that i can start work tomorrow. Pls Pls Pls Pls Pls