Jessica Simpson drowned herself in sweet booze when Jennifer Aniston & John Mayer went public
Jessica Simpson can't handle her ex John Mayer hooking up with Jennifer Aniston. So, in a move that suggests a chance form of intelligence, Jessica drank all the liquor she could get her big-breasted hands on. Nice! Us journal reports:
The 27-year-old singer was so out of it after a four-hour session of water cooler at L.A.'s Mexicali Cocina Cantina on May 10 " which started at the pre-happy hour of 4 p.m. with BFF CaCee Cobb and her beau Donald Faison " that she was reduced to leaving her Range Rover in the parking lot and calling her mom Tina for a ride home, Us reports (for good measure, CaCee Cobb threw up under the table); that same night, Us Weekly also reports that beau Tony Romo partied solo in Chicago and was overheard telling friends he was single again.
Okay, Jessica Simpson has a smoking body and drinks like a Fish (!). Holy shit, I couldn't be more in love right now. And not just because of the ecstasy. Now excuse me while I hug all my co-workers open gate with The Geekologie Writer who, dammit, just saw me coming and jumped out the window. Aww 
NOTE: Photos link to a catty tale of Tony Romo dumping Jessica before he tries to bang half of Chicago. Quasi-true story.
Photos: Flynet
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