Your Attitude, your mindset can have a great influence on your flirting ability. Go in with an ideal attitude and you're almost certain to get a positive response. Go in with a negative mindset and you don't stand a chance.

Obviously, your confidence is one of the major "mindset-factors" when it comes to flirting. In this article, I want to focus on a different aspect of mindset however. The aspect I want to discuss is what I call your value mindset. In your mind, what value do you assign to your self and what value do you assign to your partner?

Here's where a lot of men go wrong, even before they approach a woman to initiate flirting: In their minds, they see themselves as having a very different value than their partner.

On the one hand, you have the typical shy guy who's been hesitating much too long before he finally approaches a girl and has placed her on some kind of a pedestal. Basically, he's already decided that he's not worthy of her attention, even befre he approaches her. Clearly, this is not a great position to start a conversation from.

On the other end of the spectrum, we have the "jerk". This is a guy who usually needs to get drunk before he can talk to women and he tends to give them less value than himself. The problem is that the jerk doesn't dare approach someone whom he respects as an equal. Rejection from an equal is simply too painful. Because of this, he needs to devalue his partner in his mind before he can initiate contact. While being a jerk puts you in a better position for generating attraction than being the "nice guy", it's still not a very good attitude for a successful flirt.

In a nutshell, you don't want to come across as submissive and meek but neither do you want to come across as a careless idiot.

What's the best kind of mindset for a successful approach, then? The ideal mindset begins with the question: "I wonder if she is interesting?"

This mindset lets you meet women at (more or less) eye-level, ensures that you don't come across as disrespectful and also encourages you to ask questions that make her talk about herself and qualify herself to you (which works wonders for attraction).

Of course, your mindset cannot simply be changed like a light switch, but if you quietly ask yourself "I wonder if she's interesting?" as you're approaching someone, that might help in giving you a psychological bump in the right direction. Here's my challenge to you: Talk to five people today with the above question in mind, and see what happens...


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