Tags Results for 'mother'

Actresses hit the books to study for their roles (Wednesday 07th of January 2009 04:01:19 AM)

It's any parent's worst nightmare: A trusted power figure might or might not have initiated an
inappropriate llc.view results from: nomenclature | lexicon if
(lexico_globals.googleafc.ads.content.length) { document.write(lexico_globals.googleafc.a... (more)

Blonde Weighs a Baby (Monday 01st of December 2008 12:00:00 AM)

A blonde calls a pharmacy and asks if she needs an infant scale to weigh a baby. The clerk
explains that many women figure out an infant's weight by cerebration themselves while holding
the baby on an adult scale, then the mother weighs herself alone ... (more)

Very Old Mom (Sunday 07th of December 2008 12:30:04 PM)

With the help of a fertility specialist, a 65 year old woman has a baby. All her relatives come
to visit and meet the newest member of their family. When they ask to see the baby, the 65 year
old mother says, "Not yet." A little ... (more)

I will daughter you (Saturday 25th of October 2008 09:00:00 PM)

I will daughter you,follow youwherever you may gothough ties may now be brokenlove will not
have it soI will daughter you.*You won't be aloneI'll come toohowever hard the roadtogether we
will walk itwe'll share the heavy loadI will daughter you.*Never ... (more)

The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, ... (Monday 20th of October 2008 12:10:02 PM)

The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried
about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly".On her next visit the headpeeper
asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?""Yes", the boy's ... (more)

Camel Questions (Wednesday 10th of September 2008 11:15:02 PM)

A mother and baby camel are talking one day when the baby camel asks, "Mom why have I got these
huge three toed feet?" The mother replies, "Well son, when we trek across the desert your toes
will help you to stay on top of the ... (more)

A little boy and girl are in a bathtub, ... (Thursday 21st of August 2008 08:10:02 AM)

A little boy and girl are in a bathtub, and are naked because they are too little too empathy
some like that. The girl and boy ask each other: "What's that?" and they both reply: "I'll ask
my parents."So the boy goes home and asks ... (more)

A mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. ... (Sunday 17th of August 2008 12:10:02 AM)

A mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago. The son (who
had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs
and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes ... (more)

The DIY Dialysis Machine (Thursday 07th of August 2008 02:15:02 PM)

Millie Kelly was born with a state that required an instantaneous operation. During this
operation her kidneys started to fail and since she was too small for dialysis machines,
doctors told her parents that she was unlikely to live. Luckily for Millie, ... (more)

As a crowded airliner is about to take off, ... (Tuesday 05th of August 2008 08:10:02 PM)

As a crowded crate* is about to take off, the peace is shattered by a 5-year-old boy who picks
that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what his frustrated, llc.view results
from: onomasticon | lexicon if (lexico_globals.googleafc.ads... (more)

Paris Hilton's mom takes offense at McCain's humor (Lexington Herald-Leader) (Sunday 03rd of August 2008 07:27:13 PM)

Paris Hilton's mother doesn't share John McCain's sense of humor. McCain, the Republican
indirect presidential veto candidate, said last week that his drive ad mocking Democrat Barack
Obama with images of Hilton and singer Britney Spears was part of ... (more)

Paris Hilton's mom takes offense at McCain's humor (Fort Worth Star-Telegram) (Sunday 03rd of August 2008 07:17:41 PM)

Paris Hilton's mother doesn't share John McCain's sense of humor. McCain, the Republican
absolute veto candidate, said last week that his offensive ad mocking Democrat Barack Obama
with images of Hilton and singer Britney Spears was part of an attempt ... (more)

Researchers link the extreme fatigue in pulmonary fibrosis to loss in body-rejuvenating R.E.M. sleep (Wednesday 30th of July 2008 05:43:00 AM)

Family, friends and neighbors mind Lisa Sandler Spaeth as an active mother of two in Potomac,
Md., with a lot on the go, clubs her son's hurler games and her daughter's horseback-riding
lessons with several representatives obligations, organizing women's ... (more)

A family of moles had been hibernating all winter. ... (Tuesday 17th of June 2008 12:10:02 AM)

A family of moles had been hibernating all winter. One ravishing spring morning, they woke up.
The father mole stuck his head out of the hole and looked around. "Mother Mole!" He called back
down the hole. "Come up here! I smell honey, fresh made ... (more)

A man has six children... (Saturday 17th of May 2008 01:00:00 AM)

A man has six accouchement and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that
he starts calling his wife "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections. One night, they go to a
party. The man decides that it's time to ... (more)

Girl Power! (Monday 14th of April 2008 01:00:00 AM)

A little boy is playing with his new controversy and a little girl asks if she can play. He
tells her, "No. These are for boys." The little girl runs into the house and tells her mother.
The next day the girl sticks her tongue out ... (more)

Camel Questions (Sunday 23rd of March 2008 04:30:01 PM)

A mother and a baby camel were talking one day when the baby camel asked, "Mom, why do we have
these huge three-toed feet?" The mother replied, "Well son, when we trek across the desert,
our toes will help us stay on top of the soft ... (more)

Group Launches First Internet Registry Of Women With Pregnancy-Related Heart Failure (Friday 14th of March 2008 01:00:00 PM)

scholars at St. Vincent's cosmic Medical Center Manhattan have partnered with an
Internet-based support group called A Mother's Heart to launch the first online registry of
women with pregnancy-related heart failure, USA Today reports. The researchers ... (more)

Three Nuns (Thursday 21st of February 2008 12:00:00 AM)

Three nuns decided to quit so they went to the Mother over and said, "We don't want to be nuns
anymore, how do we quit?" The mother told them, "Do thing unholy and come back here in 24
hours." So the nuns left thinking, ... (more)

Ben invited his mother over for dinner. ... (Thursday 31st of January 2008 03:10:02 AM)

Ben invited his mother over for dinner. During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing how
beautiful Ben's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a consanguinity between Ben and
his roommate and this only made her more curious.Over the course ... (more)

Three Gifts (Saturday 19th of January 2008 07:30:21 PM)

Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting stable for Christmas, they
discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother. The first said, "I built a
big house for our mother." The second said, "I sent her a Mercedes." The ... (more)

As a crowded airliner is about to take off, ... (Wednesday 09th of January 2008 03:10:02 AM)

As a crowded ramjet* is about to take off, the peace is shattered by a 5-year-old boy who picks
that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what his frustrated, embarrassed mother
does to try to calm him down, the boy continues to ... (more)

The Love Dress (Tuesday 18th of December 2007 12:00:00 AM)

A woman goes over to her married son's house and walks in to find her daughter-in-law sitting
in a chair, entirely nude. The mother-in-law says, "What the hell are you doing?" "I'm wearing
my love dress," responds the daughter-in-law, "We haven't made ... (more)

Stoopid Baby Names (Saturday 17th of November 2007 12:00:00 AM)

A mother was sitting on the couch reading a book when one of her producing walked up to her
and said, "Mummy, why is my name Petal?" The mother replied, "Because when you were born, a
petal fell on your head." The next baby walked ... (more)

A little boy and girl are in a bathtub, ... (Friday 02nd of November 2007 12:30:11 PM)

A little boy and girl are in a bathtub, and are naked because they are too little too
understand everything like that. The girl and boy ask each other: "What's that?" and they both
reply: "I'll ask my parents."So the boy goes home and asks ... (more)

Moms and Their Snooping (Monday 22nd of October 2007 01:00:00 AM)

Three women are discussing their teenage daughters. The first declares: "I was so shocked
last week. I was tidying my daughter''s room and I found a packet of cigarettes under her
pillow. I didn't even know that she smoked!" "It gets worse than that," ... (more)

Traveling Salesman in West Virginia (Friday 12th of October 2007 01:00:00 AM)

A detail man knight of the road is in West virginia fence when he comes upon a house with a
little boy sitting on the front steps. "Son, is your mother home?" The little boy nods
yes. "Can I see her please?" The boy nods again, ... (more)

The Popular Mule (Saturday 29th of September 2007 01:00:00 AM)

A newlywed farmer and his wife were visited by her mother, who immediately demanded an
inspection of the place. While they were walking through the barn, the farmer's mule suddenly
reared up and kicked the mother-in-law in the head, killing her instantly. At ... (more)

Supermarket Mother (Wednesday 26th of September 2007 01:00:00 AM)

A young man was walking through a the grab to pick a few things when he noticed an old lady
coming after him around. cerebration nothing of it, he ignored her and continued on. Finally,
he went to the checkout line, but she got ... (more)

Health Tip: Do's and Don'ts While Breastfeeding (Friday 14th of September 2007 09:55:39 PM)

Since a new mother's diet can affect her breast milk, what a breast-feeding mother eats can be
as important as when she was pregnant. More: - Brought to my attention by ... (more)

 

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