Greetings,

I have an interesting true story I want to share. If you have been reading this journal, then you will understand the full meaning of it.

Alan died on a Tuesday afternoon and just that morning, out of the blue, he blurted out, “No matter what happens, promise me you will teach your class this Sunday.” I thought it was an odd request, and promptly said, “Sure, but nothing is going to happen, is it?” He gave me the strangest look, put his hand out to me and slightly smiled. “Of course not. But, I still want you to have classes on Sunday, no matter what.” I squeezed his hand, “I have no intentions of cancelling the class, not for any reason.” Two hours latter, he had died.

It was the hardest thing I had ever done, was to teach that class on the following Sunday. I almost cancelled the classes, but I kept hearing his words of, “No matter what, teach on Sunday.”

When I got to class, one of my new students pulled me aside and asked if I would like to go to a play that her son was performing in. She was excited and said it would be the following Saturday evening. I just looked at her for a long moment and then I said I would love too. When I returned home, I called my daughter and told her about the play. She thought it was a wonderful idea, but wondered why I accepted. I had no idea why I agreed, because I really was an emotional mess and I had not been to a play in years. It wasn’t my choice of activities. I asked Starla if she would go with me and there really was no need to ask, because at this point she wasn’t letting me out of her site.

On Tuesday, Starla brought me a locket. It was very special, because it had a piece of Alan’s hair within it’s hidden compartment. When the sun or light of any kind came into contact with the locket, a bright ray of light came from its silvery, middle. It was simply beautiful!

On Wednesday, a friend of mine and also a student, called and said she had the strangest dream. She did not know about the locket, but she apparently had a dream about it. She said we were at a theater of some sort. Huge Navy Blue, velvet drapes were in front of us as, we sat in some sort of seats you only see at the movie theater. She noticed a ray of light dancing on the left side of the drapes. She wondered where the light was coming from. She looked everywhere and when she turned to me, she noticed it was coming from a locket I was warring. There was a golden topaz in it’s center and the light was radiating from it. She had the feeling within her dream that something was about to be reviled and then she woke up. I told her that just yesterday, Starla had given me a locket, but it did not have a stone in its center. We both thought the dream was odd, because first of all, she doesn’t usually dream and second of all, she had no idea I had a locket. she certainly knew about the locket now.

Thursday, I received Alan’s instructions to go through a large chest he had stored in our walk-in closet. I had never known what was in this chest other than it had his baby book and few other keepsake items. When I began going through it, I found an old cassette tape by a group called the “Who”. Who were the “Who’s”? I wondered. Alan had never listen to this group as long as I knew him. When I listened to it, I could not believe he had this tape, because he never liked that type of music as far as I ever knew either. How strange! I told Starla about it and she just giggled and said, “So there was something you never knew about him. How funny, mother!” I just felt it was so very odd.

Saturday evening, we arrived a few minutes early for the play. Lexia gave us a tour of the college and then escorted us to our reserved seats. Once I got settled, my eyes drifted on the navy blue, velvet drapes covering the stage. Karen’s dream came to my mind as I sat staring at those drapes, oblivious to the conversation around me.

Then a young woman came in dancing. She walked up to Starla and said, “I just can’t help from dancing.” as she twirled around and shaking her hips. She then told Starla a joke. Starla did not even know her, but thought her joke was amusing. This young woman was with her mother too and her mother was shocked that she had just told a joke. “You never tell jokes! What is happening to you?” The young woman had no idea what came over her. She told Starla it was true, she never told jokes and was surprised she even remembered the joke in the first place. She then blurted out, “I just love the Who’s! Don’t you?” Starla grabbed up the paper they had given us at the door. She was in total disbelief. On the cover was a picture of Tommy (the main singer with the group of the Who’s) Starla grabbed my arm, whispering, “Mother! Mother are you listening to me? Look at this! Something is going on here!” I looked at the huge print of the Who’s plastered across the cover. Then the lights went dim, and a movie screen appeared on the right side of the drapes. The year 1945 flashed across the screen.

I sat staring, while Starla said, “Oh, my gosh! That is the year dad was born!” Then as quickly at it appeared, it disappeared and the drapes opened to a man saying in a very emotional tone:

“Because of you, I could climb the mountains. Because of you, I could love. Because of you, I was healed. Because of you, I could do anything. Because of you, I loved life. Because of you, I was complete.”

Starla put her arms around me as I sat stunned, with tears building and ready to stream down my face. Those were the exact words Alan had written to me in a letter, posted on our refrigerator just a few months before he died. The only other person than myself who knew about that letter was Starla. It was a total shock to hear those words.

Somehow, Alan was able to cross over into a dimension to give me a confirmation of not only how he felt, but that he did not die.

Other things began to happen. We would hear him getting up from his recliner and walk towards the landing. We would get whiffs of his cologne just for an instant while we were just chatting. A door that never opened on its own, was now being “blown” open with great force during the night. It would wake me up and I would go investigate what was going on, just to find the door open. It was the door to his office located in our home.

Finally, I told him I was alright. He could go on. I would miss him, but I would be just fine. Please do not worry any longer about me. The next day, everything stopped until …..

Two days before my grand-daughter was born, Starla took a picture at my house. It had something very unusual in it. It had Alan standing in our room in a white, Smokey fog. I whispered to myself when I saw it, “I thought you moved on? Are you still worried about me? Why are you still here?” I was so concerned that I, somehow was hanging onto him and making him stay.

Nothing more happened and then Raven LaFaye, my grand-daughter was born, on my birthday. She adores me and when I am anywhere near her or in the room, she will turn to stare and when I touch her… she continues to stare and then gives me just the faintest smile. She is only six months old and it will be interesting when she begins to talk. Starla is amazed at how Raven LaFaye reacts to me. To be honest, I am a bit perplexed by it too. But, I have not mentioned my thoughts to Starla in fear she will think I am nuts.

Dear Mr. Alan, I do not think you will like being a female, but I wish you happiness, friendship and most of all …. true love in your days ahead of you. You know I am here, if you ever need me, until it is my turn to cross over. You better not follow me when that time comes! You will still be very young and a whole new life of your very own.

Added Notes: The topez is a stone of the sun. (Alan loved Summer and the heat of the sun.) It is also a stone for Leo. (Alan was a Leo.)

Lexia, was horrified that she asked me to see a play with my husband just passing over. She had no idea what came over her. Even to this day, she wonders why she spoke without thinking.

Raven Lafaye was not scheduled to be born until two weeks before my birthday. They were going to induce labor, but her doctor was mysteriously out of town for a family emergency. Then on the morning on May 26th, Starla went into labor. That afternoon I received a phone call. "Happy birthday mother! You have a Grand-daughter."

The tape of the "who's" was so old that no one thought it would be able to play. They were right. The only song that came through was one about "Loving each moment of their life even if with physical pain." This answered one of my questions about Alan. Did he really enjoyed the past two years of his life, with all of the pain he had endured?

Raven LaFaye holds her left leg in a fold, when she sits. Alan favored siting the same as she is doing now. She is very sinsitive with her right ankle and does not like it touched. After Alan came home from the hospital, he favored his right ankle too.

Nothing else has happened since Raven LaFaye was born. Also, Alan loved to share jokes with most everyone. Alan must be gone, or is he?