as a kid, i grew up with much more that i could ask for. nice house, nice clothes... nice everything... but not a nice family life. yeah, we were rich but not rich in love. my kuya died een efore i realized that he was the only one i could turn to and that was before my sister came into view.

being both girls, we agree on almost everything. we never fought... we never did. she was one of my best friends and it left me davastated as well when she had to leave to study abroad. i miss her so much... and this year, she's facing the most hurtful dilemma she had ever encountered.

we are the heirs to our family's tycoon business. hard as it is, most of us undergo arranged marriages and since she's the next in line this year, she'll be meeting her fiance. and take note... she doesn't even know the guy! she'll be meeting him for the first time and boom! they'll be getting married after the next five years! can you believe it? out of the blue my sister's getting married! a shocking situation, yeah i know... but let me tell you of the one guy she loved.

it was in her high school days when she met Harry. he was a great guy and for once i knew i wanted him for my sister. i can see how much he loved her and how much she loved him as well. he was the type of guy who would be up for anything as long as my sis was happy. they were happy. until that fateful day, my sister was told she had to leave for america to pursue her business studies. she cried all night, she had to let go of Harry.

and she did. they separated. the last thing i know about Harry is that he still loves ate esa but he has to set her free. he said that maybe, it's just not their destiny to be together.

but lately, they have been in touch and based on the family code of our chinese family, my sister can refuse the marriage after all! yAy!

but that has got to be "yAy" for her... i am next in line.

if she refuses, it will be me who will have the cruel fate she once had. but i have to give that chance of happiness to my sister even if it means losing mine forever. i am so crying now!

she just called me and asked me if i was okay with that and at first all i managed to say was "huh?" then flashes of images flooded my mind... i thought of HIM. i was afraid of loving him, thinking i can make the same mistake i did with the first one... and now am i bound to lose him forever? i don't want to...

am i suppose to let go of you just like that?

when all i wanted to do was gather up the courage to say what i really feel about you?!

why?